The six horsemen of an impending hurricane, in order of severity:
- Publix begins selling hurricane cakes
- Midwestern family starts checking in
- Disney closes
- Editor asks you to check out plywood supply at Home Depot
- Jim Cantore arrives
- Waffle House closes
i am SO SICK of summer i want FALL i want to wear PANTS and eat SOUP and drink HOT COFFEE and rake LEAVES and summon DEMONS while everyone is ASLEEP and the moon is FULL and i’m wearing a SWEATER
Kate Pierson of the B-52s is selling her fantastic motel near Woodstock but my friends laughed it off when I suggested going in on it together and creating a commune, which is frankly very rude of them!!
@aasuaje@noelness The most quotable! My favorite keeps changing but always toward the top is “Is there something you could share with the rest of us, Amazing Larry?!”
Become a writer anyway. Fuck it, do it, it won't save you, but it's still a beautiful dream to write novels and short stories and poems and mingle with other dreamers and make art and laugh in the face of death. And writing is constant death. May you always live más.
I contacted @Chewy last week to see if I could return an unopened bag of my dog’s food after he died. They 1) gave me a full refund, 2) told me to donate the food to the shelter, and 3) had flowers delivered today with the gift note signed by the person I talked to?? 😭🥹
The Laundry Jet is the first vacuum powered laundry chute that transports laundry from any room with ports installed, to the laundry room [read more: https://t.co/ad50LRzmkn]
This did not age well. Concert is tomorrow and I’m not going because, once again, crowds (even outdoors, as this show is) seem like a bad idea! Great job, everybody!!
I’m officially fully vaccinated!! To celebrate I bought tickets to a concert happening almost 13 months from now, which is still probably the earliest I’ll feel comfortable leaving my house!!
I once watched a colleague (who had just returned to work after maternity leave) highlight every email in her inbox and press delete. When she saw the look on my face, she shrugged and said, "If they really need to talk to me, they'll find me." I think of her nearly every day.
@TheyWrestleTest I just made this one. I really liked the different take on a classic—it’s got Thai flavors from lime, ginger & soy sauce! https://t.co/cf9SEdc7UA
Do I understand what is happening? I do not. Do I know what the colored blocks mean? I do not. Am I happy that everyone seems so happy with their colored blocks? I am.
I gave birth over Thanksgiving weekend, and I said that honestly I was glad for it to be happening then, when everyone else was out catching covid, rather than the following weekend, when everyone would be in the hospital being treated for it, and all the nurses were like “YUP”
I also had a high-risk pregnancy and was advised to skip appointments I otherwise would have had! And only patients were allowed in the office, so my husband couldn’t come to ultrasounds and missed seeing our baby move! Great job, everyone!
lol my doctor recommended I don't come in for a high risk ultrasound for a high risk baby in a high risk pregnancy because of the Omicron spike but by all means fucking hang out and pretend it's whatever.