Dana Bettac

self described high functioning dumbass (she/her)

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

I wear bold colours of lipstick so people don't notice that I didn't do my hair

[Edmonton Oilers @EdmontonOilers]

🇩🇪🚬😂

[ArtButMakeItSports @ArtButSports]

Christ in a Red Robe, by Minerva Teichert, 1945, 📸 by Brian Babineau

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Whatever random person left this in my mailbox with zero context or explanation- I love you

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Will I ever grow out of that ‘what if I’m the only dressed up at the Halloween party?!’ anxiety? Seems unlikely at this point

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

I can test how drunk I am by opening instagram and seeing how tempted I am to comment on everyone’s story

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

@juliale123 ……. Again???

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

I wanna be a morning person so badly, like I’d love to be one of those people who sits and watches the sunrise with a cup of coffee while they start their day. But also when my alarm goes off I have to fast track the 5 stages of grief before I get up so it’s probably not for me

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Concerned about how often I ask myself ‘am I wearing all black in a cool way or in a weird way’

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

One of my favorite parts of the day is when my alarm goes off, and my dog has the audacity to sigh so deeply that he sounds like a slowly deflating balloon, like he’s the one who’s gotta get up and go to their job

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Guy on tinder saw my job is listed as ‘bookkeeper’ so he messaged me and asked if I could solve a problem he was having on quickbooks… very excited to learn the sexiest thing about me is my knowledge of accounting software.

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Oh sure independence is all well and good until you need someone to put sunscreen on your back. I almost had to resort to just squeezing the bottle onto my bathroom floor and rolling around like a flipped turtle

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

At least 7% of my life is just sitting in the sun and hoping it fixes whatever’s wrong, like some sort of wilted houseplant

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Every day I grow more and more sure that the phrase ‘unprecedented times’ is going to give me a low grade form of PTSD someday

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

I hope whoever has been decorating these cute little frogs that sit on the route I walk my dog knows that they made my 2020 a little better

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

You ever read just the stupidest fucking comment on facebook from someone you barely know, and it just kinda leaves you like ‘huh. You really live like this. Interesting’

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

A big, jacked up truck stopped next to me at a red light on my drive home and the fluffiest little dog I’ve ever seen was staring at me from their passenger window 🥺 That’s the closest I’ve felt to joy in months.

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Every time I leave a bridal shower/engagement party/wedding I always have the thought ‘maybe I want to get married too?’ but I’m pretty sure it’s only because I see how many presents you receive, and it’s been suggested to me that’s the ‘wrong reason’ to do it

[Dana Bettac @bettac15]

Had a guy I hadn’t heard from in a month message me and be like ‘haha sorry for ghosting, what’s up?’ and my dumbass decided to respond, and has now been ghosted for a second time. I’ll be getting fitted for clown shoes first thing tomorrow.

[hannah @hsawyerrrr]

seth rogen explaining it in the simplest way possible