Billy Adamo

[𝖓❦™️ @kushb6rbie]

they stop asking for ur ID once the light in your eyes is gone

[Grace @gracecamille_]

3 glasses of wine deep and saw someone outside smoking a cig

[RODEOHOUSTON @RODEOHOUSTON]

Intrusive thoughts won 🐑

[sine. @sneminaj]

apparently telling your coworker that you knew they were born by c-section the way they avoid labor is not acceptable

[Meg @megannn_lynne]

Ummmm no I don’t watch “Instagram Reels.” I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

Me: hey windows can you delete this file please

Windows: you got it, j-... omg there's actually a program using it right now

Me: omg who 😳

Windows: omg I can't say 🫣

[𝗁𝗈𝗈𝖽 𝗅𝗈𝗋𝖽 𝖿𝖺𝗋𝗊𝗎𝖺𝖺𝖽💂🏾‍♂️ @hoodfarquaad]

look what that money make a bitch do

[General Steez @generalsteez69]

Fuckkkkkkk apparently they just added an amendment to the Big Beautiful Bill that is forcing me to drink beers on a rooftop tonight

[Joseph 🕊️ @CaudilloXIV]

We live in the ruins of a greater civilization

[Dom @damnitmoonmoon_]

What I think will happen everytime I ask “can I join”

[Chris @citehchris]

not to be controversial but you should be allowed to leave work early to get drinks if the weather is nice enough

[h @jamtoastaurchai]

your 20s are for figuring out what's the max number of times you can hit rock bottom in a calendar year

[Loky @lokymann]

Run errands early as shit before the idiots wake up

[Ryan Fedrau @the_fed_23]

One of the most meaningful wins in U.S. hockey history:

▪️Our national anthem was disrespected—twice.
▪️Their fans trashed our country all week.
▪️We walked into their biggest hockey market and beat their national team on their ice.

USA showed up tonight 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

#4Nations

[poppa @popitforpoppa]

just cut off a student driver. welcome to the real world bitch