B

Online journal of an unconventional erratic thinker

[B @blackbirdbim]

These weekends aren’t feeling so restful🙂‍↔️

[B @blackbirdbim]

It doesn’t matter what people think, just do you.

[Jade Osiberu @jadeosiberu]

I know a number of people who didn’t marry their “spec” but are in the healthiest marriages I know. Their spec was typically whatever was culturally deemed to be at the apex of the attractiveness pyramid when they were growing up. For a lot of guys in my generation, it was the music video “vixens” from the late 90s/early 2000s Hip & R&B music videos with ‘coke bottle figures’ and or light skinned eurocentric features. When it’s time to find a partner for the very serious endeavor of sharing a life with, that “spec” is simply inadequate as a measure of compatibility and that’s understandable. The foolishness though is communicating it as though their partner somehow didn’t measure up to their “spec” instead of simply admitting that the idea of their spec was stupid all along and a young boy’s lack of wisdom of what makes a good life partner.

Communicating publicly or even privately to your partner that they weren’t your spec to begin with may seem harmless, after-all you’re just being honest. But subconsciously, it’s an ego trip for you who “settled” and for your the partner, it’s a chip they will always carry on their shoulder that to you, they aren’t quite enough. They’re missing something you had always longed for, so much so that you still consider it to be your “spec”. It’s an unnecessary mind fuck and a cruel thing to say about somebody who is sharing a life with you. No matter how flowery you are with the compliments that come after. You’ve already knocked them down several pegs.

If the point is to say your spec changed then talk about the stupidity of having a spec to begin with. Because I’ve never heard anyone in these situations talk about character attributes being their spec, it’s always superficial stuff. Or speak about how meeting your partner opened your eyes to what true beauty is. Speak in ways that elevate and affirm your partner.

[B @blackbirdbim]

I love you tomorrow, you’re always a day away…

[B @blackbirdbim]

I’m just a girl🙂

[liz🧚 @Lizformee]

I hate a “well you didn’t either” kind of man. F*cking lead & stop being a princess.

[Tarelayefa @Sugar_Pops_]

My hot take is that women like these are not rare at all. Most women are like this.

As men have insisted that cheating is their birthright, and “all men cheat”, women too have learnt to stay in relationships, but withdraw love.

Men think there is no consequence to infidelity because they watched their mothers stay with quiet compliance and without any fights or complaint, then still carry out their homely responsibilities.

The consequence was ‘love’. Your mothers did not love your fathers, and your wives will not love you.

Keep cheating ❤️

[B @blackbirdbim]

Ups and downs

[B @blackbirdbim]

The magic of time.

[B @blackbirdbim]

No one said it’d be easy but it sure is doable 💪🏾

[s44ntii @s44nti]

gasté dinero como si no hubiera mañana y si hubo mañana

[Phil @pieandpint19]

Signed up for a bowel cancer screening programme so got my kit 2 weeks ago
Did the sample and sent it back, within 3 days I got a letter back saying there were indications of blood in my sample
Was booked in for a colonoscopy 5 days later
Went today for it and they found a

[B @blackbirdbim]

Reason 0.6 to get married: free massages! Spas here are quite expensive and the massages are no good on top of that, leave feeling exactly the same🙂‍↔️

[B @blackbirdbim]

Reached the stage of adulthood where all I have on my wishlist are household items: couch, bed, air fryer…🤣Why are they so freaking expensive😭

[B @blackbirdbim]

Lmao love how my friend is so onboard, she knows I don’t like to share a lot about myself and definitely not in real time. But she takes it so far, somethings aren’t even secret but she’ll tell me: someone asked me and I told them to ask you because I don’t know. She knows🤣

[B @blackbirdbim]

Was almost getting frustrated that I might have to go without an air fryer for a bit then I remembered, I grew up without an air fryer! Easy easy easy😅

[B @blackbirdbim]

No one/thing can take it away when it’s in you😊😇

[B @blackbirdbim]

Don’t know if I should have posted that or not😬

[B @blackbirdbim]

Oh I haven’t danced like this in a while💃🏽Eja n la🙌🏾

[jezz @JezziiB]

My husband’s friend works in a Walmart distribution center. She says it can get very hot in there. But they finally have some decent AC. Why? Because the robots that are there now require cool air to function. Fuck the humans but cater to the machines. What a disgrace.