alexei

Power starved baby that just wants love

[alexei @blind_feline]

I swear to god I'm gonna get a tattoo of an origami croissant 🥐

[cats with powerful impression 🐾 @catshealdeprsn]

They make a great couple!

[alexei @blind_feline]

You ever feel grateful for what you don’t have?
For example, today I was squeezing a lime and (because I wasn’t blessed with perfect vision) was wearing a shield in the form of my glasses when the juice squirted all over my face somehow

[gio 💋🩸 @giohalliwell]

Not grab my glasses I’m out the door I’m gonna hit p diddy😭 https://t.co/k4qTdtFyfq

[alexei @blind_feline]

rip my student loan saving-funds

[alexei @blind_feline]

Anyone got some tips for falling asleep? I tried this hack where I go online shopping and order Fenty Beauty products but I don’t think it’s working.

[alexei @blind_feline]

@tribblemethis Yeah it’s got a nice tartness so I’m not gona be sipping on it addictive, but it’s supposed to help me sleep. Basically if I just have a dl it’s like 1€ a portion

[alexei @blind_feline]

Hello I turned thirty and as a responsible adult who knows how to finance my life bought a liter of organic juice for ten euros

[alexei @blind_feline]

Boyfriend: *borrowing my comfy office chair for gaming with the lads*
Me: *coming in to do work on my desk and using his old wonky office chair bc come on, would be rude to kick him off a chair he’s already using*
Bf: *without a word starts googling office chairs (out of guilt?)*

[She-Rage, Princess of Pain @ClaireMax]

Back in ye olde Hunter-gatherer days, some of us would have had to stay up and keep watch for predators overnight. That would have been me. you can thank us night people for the fact that we all didn’t get eaten by wolves in our sleep.

[alexei @blind_feline]

Your boyfriend drunkenly agreeing to things after you sent him some 🌶️ pics is legally binding, right?

[alexei @blind_feline]

The world rewards my responsibility of going to bed early by blessing me with a cat that rips down not only the curtains but the metallic lining attaching them to the ceiling as well.
Mirin my sweet, you’re not an asshole, but you are, very dumb.

[alexei @blind_feline]

@iLLuteracy: Don’t self-diagnose
Me: Bitch! Try and stop me!

[alexei @blind_feline]

Me shouting “Chanterelle!!” when I asked my boyfriend to Google what it was bc I thought I just made up a word for the mushroom type but it ended up being the actual word and then trying to bite his phone is appropriate grounds for him asking me if I took my medication today

[alexei @blind_feline]

@tribblemethis I’ll call it X as soon as the Musky boy stops deadnaming his daughter

[iza 💐 🕺 SUMMER FUNK SUMMER @gabbanisgorilla]

i'm not feeling very cha cha cha anymore #Eurovision2023

[Chris (Simpsons artist) @getbentsaggy]

thanks finland xox

#eurovision

[Chris (Simpsons artist) @getbentsaggy]

hide your hats before he eats them xox

#eurovision

[Chris (Simpsons artist) @getbentsaggy]

i would like some nuts and bolts please xox

#eurovision

[alexei @blind_feline]

@miksueeli I thought it was “Satan sinner”…