My agenda today:
• Vote
• Drag Show
• Abortion at lunch
• Vote again
• Sex change in a prison bathroom
• Put tampons in the men's room
• Cast some spells while listening to Taylor Swift
• Eat pets for dinner in Springfield
• Take "illegals" to vote
Joe Biden and Donald Trump have officially secured enough delegates to become the Democratic and Republican nominees for President, cementing a rematch between the two in November.