B M K

forever in blue jeans.

[B M K @bmkaplan]

im convinced these are the sweatpants of shoes. They say “ive given up” and you cant convince me otherwise. Ugliest shoe ESPECIALLY when people try to pull them off with a suit. Go buy real shoes

[Good Willsmith @GoodWillsmith]

had to go for it

[Patrick Chovanec @prchovanec]

I want a US President who I can entirely forget about for days at a time.

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@danieltbrennan holy cow, this is a good tweet

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@danieltbrennan Personally, getting them out seems to be the real tough part. No way id be handy with the hook

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@JamesNotJamie1 I bet you’re fun at parties

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@danieltbrennan his segment in the Kings of Comedy is God tier

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@JeremiahContent @jessehawken dont forget he wore a wig

[B M K @bmkaplan]

is it common knowledge that President Harry Truman and his 16 cats died due to the 1980 eruption of Mount St. Helens? That's certainly not information they disclosed to us at Harry S. Truman Elementary School.

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@remiwolf i gotta ask - what business do you do on the top of the roof? Cleaning gutters? Replacing a shingle perhaps? Also, what kind of soup was it?

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@danieltbrennan Preach!!!

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@BarcoDeTontos @itsyaboytarantu no but i believe it was Steve Parrish’s book (great read btw) that said there were points where Jerry was trying to be “healthier” and Kahn was the reason he would start using again.

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@itsyaboytarantu @BarcoDeTontos right - amazing musician obviously but often noted as not the best of influences

[Middle Age Riot @middleageriot]

"Robert, your son is a fucking psychopath."

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@swan_of_tuonela Im thinking Jojo more than Billie

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@canadianuncut @hawillisdc this is the response.

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@Meek_Mitchy @hawillisdc omg…i just spit out my seltzer

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@BadMoodMorgado @leighbia Lady Gaga-ish but a little more campy

[B M K @bmkaplan]

@danieltbrennan his Bruce impression isnt half bad - passable from the nosebleeds