bondtastic🐝

“Says he's a beautician and sells you nutrition, keeps all your dead hair for making up underwear” —David Robert Jones

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

Me: Hey Siri, lights on.
Siri: Just a second...
Me: ......
Siri: Processing....
Me: ......
Siri: I’ve sent the request.

TO WHOM?!!??

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@arhuml92 Hang on - I may have completely misunderstood your question. Do you mean when paste is fresh and rolls off your brush to get stuck in the beard? Or when it drips out the side of the mouth and mucks up the chin hair?

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@arhuml92 Too much. Use a blob the size of a pea. It’s more than enough, trust me. And as you put it on the brush, push it down on the bristles as you’re breaking it off.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@cereal_twit Feel you. However I’d like to know what kind of “fancy private hospital” this is in ISB where mri is only Rs 14k??

I cry every time I go to AKUH for a ct or mri….

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@arhuml92 “The Taliban goons have taken over Afghanistan so let’s embark on the busiest intl tour schedule we’ve had in a long time - what could possibly go wrong??” is what just happened.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@sugarmontings Hum kahan ke sachay thay ke aasmaan hum se waaday rakhta?

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@JibbyD Fucking Adnan…

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@ParkerOrtolani Is this available for non-7 watches?

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@HawkesBay @mahobili Saanmp really….

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@brain_dead94 @HawkesBay Daaaaamn. In a weird twisted way, they earned those sandwiches.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@bluemagicboxes Lady’s got Danon oozing out of her pores now- it’s understandable.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@BuffetKh0r Yes.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@scihubot LIAR

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@EmmaRaducanu No, but you are for sure 😄

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@arhuml92 @AsfandyarKhan90 Is yer boi cute enough to get the main sewage line by my house fixed/replaced ?

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@Yeezus_Chwist But even the meat is crap compared to the authentic style.

It’s a freakin travesty.

The awaam at large has no taste buds I think. Everything is burnt to a crisp, even burger meat. Jala hua khana with mirch and masala. Bas.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@Yeezus_Chwist Does this not strike you as odd? One would think it’d be the first thing to come to Pakistan as a “foreign food”. But I’ve hunting for it since the 90s, and still nothing. 💀

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@TheAndrewNadeau @sugarmontings I’m afraid not. It’s really John Wick going in guns blasting to fuck up everything Neo achieved in the first 3.

[bondtastic🐝 @bond9]

@sugarmontings What are you taking it for