Jolie Blonde

I have 100 junior high essays for you to read if you want to feel better about that typo in your brilliant tweet.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

Hey. I'm gonna be @JolieEsprit for a while. I've missed her.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

@Norsebysw I'm an educator. I know first hand how frustrating and demoralizing this is. Cal is damn lucky to have you.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

@A_Trusov It was Coach Poppy, the deep pink label. Also, DKNY Be Delicious Fresh Blossom, maybe?

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

@A_Trusov You know I changed districts a few years ago? I know I disappeared for awhile. New school, district is a very positive place.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

@A_Trusov I'm OK, but exhausted. I've learned my lesson about ignoring symptoms. Everyone at work is being really awesome to me, though.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

@A_Trusov Thank you. I have plenty of time to read it right now. 💕

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

How is it possible that I've lived in CA for 17 years & didn't hear about Valley Fever until I was hospitalized for it? It's not fun, y'all.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

The amusing pain of a coworker trying to flirt with you when he ain't got game.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

Longing for vision from people who only care about optics.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

This is my cerebral account. I only act like an idiot on the Interwebs when I'm @JolieEsprit.

[Buddawiggi @MarkBuckawicki]

Public education - 2020

Choose 1 of 3 trades:

1) How to prepare coffee

2) How to prepare & serve food

3) Online customer service

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

I was just awarded tenure. I needed to tweet it. That is all.

[Wassi @0mysky]

Love me once and be forever.

[Charlotte Clymer 🇺🇦 @cmclymer]

GMA Reporter: "Did it take some convincing to come back to Star Wars?"
Carrie Fisher: "No, I'm a female in Hollywood over 40."

Daaaaamn.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

Hey. You know that pic of you hiking? Yeah? Fuck you and the outdoors, man.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

Today, I tried but failed @ Being a good Catholic, convincing my mom to smoke weed for health problems, feeling I'm too sexy for this shirt.

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

Here's my Twitter password. If I ever retweet @'s that are selfie compliments, kill me and make it look like a Twittercide.

[Wonkette @Wonkette]

Carly Fiorina OK With Terrorists Buying Guns As Long As They Use Them Responsibly https://t.co/y5wun8ohK3

[Jolie Blonde @bootjackblonde]

I open up to very few people. It takes ages for me to trust someone. If I let you in and you walk away, know that you no longer exist.