Will

Retweets are clearly endorsements- anyone who says otherwise is a liar. Knuckleball enthusiast. Permanent Daylight Savings Time Proponent. @RiceUniversity ‘18

[jen @hiiiijen]

don’t ask me to play pickleball w you. play tennis like an adult

[Joey Politano 🏳️‍🌈 @JosephPolitano]

every 6 months the Trump administration realizes lowering tariffs will lower prices, applies this insight to one specific good, and then proceeds to never introspect beyond that. It’s honestly beautiful in its stupidity.

[ren ᶻ𝗓𐰁 @acorpseofagirl]

i love how everyone still calls twitter twitter

[Jack Loder @JackLoder_]

The entire infield sitting there like ohhh brother here goes coach Joel Osteen again with our season on the damn line

[Alfie | HITC Sevens @AlfiePottsH]

In light of Gianni Infantino’s poor judgement this week, I am beginning to question whether Donald Trump was a worthy recipient of the FIFA Peace Prize after all.

[Cameron 🇺🇸 🗽🦅 @CameronCorduroy]

this is the official CDC website btw

we're cooked

[Chess.com @chesscom]

can't even en passant without offsides anymore

[Taylor Twellman @TaylorTwellman]

Red card for that means you’ve lost the plot. Completely lost the plot. #USMNT

[yosoymario @yosoymario91]

Viking raider chasing a panicked Muslim defender through the streets of Seville, 844 AD al-Andalus

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[CALL TO ACTIVISM @CalltoActivism]

DONALD TRUMP HAS FALLEN ASLEEP AT THE NBA FINALS IN MADISON SQUARE GARDEN.

[nathan @nathanrobii]

it will only ever be the second best piece of media about chris hansen

[onion person @CantEverDie]

pretty crazy how blatant the ending of the late show is just an act of government censorship lol

[mr locke sportello @BenShh1]

it’s funny to not know whether this is about a deadly virus or an NFL coach having an affair

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

Look, was LIV Golf successful? No.

Did it bolster the reputations of everybody involved? Also, no.

But was it fun? Once again, no.

[Jordanreviewsittt @jordanreviewsit]

Commuting to the office to take virtual calls 😍

[PGA TOUR @PGATOUR]

Now on the tee, from New Orleans, Louisiana ... 🐊

#TOURVault