Dave Barton

Livin' life as my parents favorite mistake

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Do you do 1:00 or 60sec on the microwave for a minute warmup?

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

@Dijon_sturdman

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Toaster ovens r sick

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

@Jon13167024 Sorry you look like spambot I misinterpreted

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

@_nathanielson @nyykolis Np ur welcome

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

@nyykolis Best part is she’s wearing an empower women T-shirt

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

If you curl in the squat rack your moms a hoe

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

That moment when you accidentally send lots of ppl things on their IG stories and don't understand how you did it. This must be how my parents felt learning how to txt lol

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

A significant other that looks at you the same way Bob Ross looks at his paintings would be the ideal scenario

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

@RL_Support thank you so much for having the most unreliable servers imaginable. Your game is unplayable tonight..

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Today's an eight scrambled egg kinda day if you ask me

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Try pure honey instead of sugar in your coffee and I bet you'll like it/feel better after consuming

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

@RL_Support for the love of god fix your fucking servers...

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Wisdom teeth gonezo...also on a weird note this combo of Valium and laughing gas got me feelin noiiicceee this Friday morning

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

If anyone wants a hitstick straight outta madden I'm available

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Inhaled a 32oz prime rib cut and it was a glorious victory 🤘🏻

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Back workouts and progressive house music >>>>

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

What a shitty time to be single and scroll down your IG feed...

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

I miss the summers where you rode everywhere by bicycle and had to have the coolest lanyard for your house key

[Dave Barton @bowflex_barton]

Just jokingly yelled "If you need me ill be in the study!" like a disappointed dad would and it sounded so good I've figured out I want a house with a study