bpdtalks

33 yr old w/ borderline personality disorder, MDD, & chronic illness. here to support others & be real about life w/ bpd. expecting my 1st baby in sept!

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

I don't expect people to feel sorry for me. I mainly want them to believe that I am trying my hardest & that what I'm going through is real.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

I just laughed so hard at The Office while breastfeeding that the baby unlatched. Sorry, little one.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

I wish feelings didn't insist on constantly being felt. #bpd

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@MsRachyDoodle That's how I feel currently!! Depression can be crushing and just so tedious but I know what to expect. Anxiety is so unpredictable and terrifying.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

To me depression is like a big blob that I have to poke, prod, and get out from under or it might suffocate me. Anxiety is like a crazed wild beast that I have to find a way to control. Both are awful in different ways, but I think I hate anxiety more.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@NotTheWhiskey I wish someone would invent plastic sinuses. I'd give up taste & smell if it meant no more sinus pain.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@Wanderingpsych Thanks. Yes, my delivery was kind of traumatic--my uterus tore and I lost lots of blood & I could feel a lot of what they were doing to me. So I think I am still getting over that in some ways.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

4 days postpartum & my anxiety is thru the roof, even though I'm happy. I'm having a lot of panic & intrusive thoughts about bad things happening to my baby. I need everyone's tips/advice on dealing with panic & scary thoughts!!!

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@firebirdblog Thanks. I'm in the US and my OBs office gave me some resources. It's weird, I was kind of braced for depression and I've read/heard a lot about PPD. I just wasn't prepared for this level of anxiety, even though it makes sense that a new mom would be worried.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@bipolarmamaphd I really like my OB. I feel like she took me seriously and was reassuring when I was terrified in the OR. Thanks for recommending Postpartum Support International. I will check them out.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@bitchlasagna24 Thank you. Twitter really is an awesome place for support and venting. There's usually someone who cares and will listen.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@raxonator Thank you. It does help to be able to say what I'm thinking or even just say, "I'm really scared right now."

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

I gave birth via emergency c-section yesterday morning at 8:10 am. Part of my uterus tore and I lost a lot of blood. It was the most terrifying experience of my life. But my son is the most wonderful, beautiful, amazing thing in my life. I am so happy & grateful.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@nicimos_ Thank you! I feel incredibly lucky and am so happy to become a mother.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@MissLexisaurus Thank you ♡

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

I've been off meds for about 11 months now & have been doing pretty well. With my due date coming up I'm fairly concerned about postpartum depression/anxiety. I keep telling myself that I have coping skills & that going back on meds if I need to won't equal failure.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@ShannonDavissm Thanks! it says pregosaurus :)

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

Baby is due in 10 days! I'm so ready to meet him. Also I'm looking forward to being awake constantly because I'm taking care of my baby instead of being awake constantly because I'm in pain.

[Jess @JessAlice1992]

It still baffles me that “never had a day off sick” is used as a mark of commitment in workplaces. Congratulations on your good health and robust immune system but it doesn’t make you a better employee than someone who hasn’t been so fortunate

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

Too bad overanalyzing doesn't burn calories or turn a profit.

[bpdtalks @bpd_talks]

@Sarah_FTHC happy birthday!! I hope you have a great day!