the bolter

certified crow lady. rip jimmy buffett.

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Playing show tunes at the restaurant today cause fuck it I’m the manager

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Lucky cause I have a boyfriend who just does my taxes for me without asking

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Rich because I had the most peaceful and love filled Valentine’s and birthday to date 🩷 finally picking peace over chaos and I’ve never felt more fulfilled

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Two AI generated commercials back to back while watching the nfl today America is never beating the lazy asshole allegations

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

My bf got to boo trump live and in person today I’m so proud.

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

@emmaincontro Deal

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

I hope Taylor asks me to be her bridesmaid given she’s my close personal friend and all

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

I mourn for memories I haven’t seen yet

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

@jerseyywh0re Republican

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Men of the world I am begging you, pls stop wearing so much cologne. I promise no one thinks you smell good.

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Was at the clubhouse of a golf course in NY recently and the gen z bartender was playing Barbie princess and the pauper on the tv at full volume. I haven’t stopped thinking about it

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

@Tybug112 You’re who we need in Idaho 🫡 keep on keepin on friend 🩷

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Sooooooo many men will try to hide that they’re republican to bag a baddie…stay safe out there girlies 🫡

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

What I’ve learned after getting thru half of the Star Wars franchise for the first time: Jedi are born and stay miserable, the women always end up being right and the more emotionally stable ones in any scenario, and C-3PO and R2D2 are the main characters

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

I’m like , weirdly good at shuffleboard. Like table shuffleboard. I will beat you. And I don’t know why. I don’t even try and I’m so good at it. I’ve never been more naturally successful at anything in my life. I fear I missed an opportunity in my 20s

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Men 35+ who shave a mustache bc it’s “so silly” when they’re actually just trying to cover up their countless insecurities. It’s a tale as old as time pls stop embarrassing yourselves

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

@jerseyywh0re So real

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

The thing is, Pedro pascal would want me to get my nails done

[the bolter @braidsalexandra]

Just realized I have THREE matching tattoos with my best friend, the third of which I got at a private tattoo party that I threw for her for her 30th birthday. I’m rICH RICH 🥹