Artimus Branesample

Some of them are just for me.
Check out my videos on YouTube. They're free.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@ABranesample will be using this account for the next 5 1/2 days.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@BenZeisloft I wonder why they chose not to adopt a preamble that is antithetical to the freedoms it protects.
Weird.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@sofain Have you tried having them pull a lighter sled?

Give'm kisses from Uncle Artimus.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@NuckChorris16 I got a new phone and I can't get my other account fired up.
Time for a curt panic.

[GonnaGoForIt (GonnaGoForIt.bsky.social) @YTGGFI]

Mine too.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@NuckChorris16 I can't.
Look at me!!!

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@NuckChorris16 Her Elevens Are Showing.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@Isethoriginal Hahahaha
"Wind chill".
That's why, Graber!

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@BrunoCleveland5 @RobertS73441608 @queen0fheathens @Carious1 @dep_infect Thanks Bruno.
Idiots don't make me angry.
I don't need to be angry to point out the character flaws of simpletons, Bruno.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@thesnarkygent Well, we have two major parties in the US and I said something about both of them. (Easier to explain than not, I think.)
They've colluded to ensure that there will only ever be two major parties but, that's immaterial to your question.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@NuckChorris16 If I can help, tell me.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@VickyBall3 The final insult is the reaction of your friends when you answer their question about the age of your kid.
Invariably, your child's age will make your friends feel exponentially older than you do.
Fuck those ppl.
LoL
;)

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@VickyBall3 Mine's 30.
You get used to it.
;)

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

Genuine trend that I just don't fkn get: primer grey vehicles
I don't care if there's flake in it, it's primer grey.
It will always look like you gave up at the paint.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@queen0fheathens I almost said some shit that'd fkt up your joke.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@MySportsUpdate Won't pay for ESPN and I already pay for Amazon but, those are the pairs I'd most enjoy listening to.
RedZone to the rescue!!!

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@SteveTiger999 I pity them.

[Artimus Branesample @branesample]

@PaulLahticks That's a high quality joke, my friend.