#RedAlert 🇳🇬

Sapiosexual #iDoNotFFB #BBOG #PrayForHumanity #EndSARS #ReformPoliceNG #EndBadGovernance
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[Peter Obi @PeterObi]

Dear beloved sports-loving Nigerian youths,

After watching the performances of Davido, Burna Boy, and Rema at the opening of the 2026 World Cup—at a time when Nigeria, the giant of Africa, is absent—I felt a measure of consolation. This was reinforced by the fact that many Nigerians playing for clubs worldwide are representing other countries. Felix Nmecha, for instance, set a record by scoring the fastest goal at six minutes for Germany. I write to you therefore, knowing that this country belongs to you, the youth.

You are more of stakeholders in Nigeria’s future than I am. I am 64 years old; by God’s grace, much of my journey is behind me, while yours lies ahead.

It is therefore imperative that you rise to the challenge by obtaining your PVC, your most powerful tool for driving the change you desire.

In the last three years alone, over 15 million Nigerians have turned 18—enough to decide who becomes President, Governor, Senator, Member of the House, or Local Government Chairman. Indeed, enough to shape the nation’s future.

I know many of you are sceptical about politics and political parties. I understand why, but scepticism must not become surrender.

You do not need to belong to any party or wait for anyone to organise you. Organise yourselves in your streets, campuses, communities, workplaces, churches, mosques, and social groups. Mobilise, debate, demand accountability, and take part in choosing those you wish to entrust with leadership.

If you are organised and wish to hear directly from me, invite me. I will come and share my plans for you and our nation.

Do not sit on the sidelines while others decide your future.

I appeal to you to register and vote. Your vote can shape who becomes the next President of our country.

My young friends, this is your country. Take it back.

A New Nigeria is POssible. -PO

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

I fact-checked this and imagine my shock to find out he actually said this.

[Abdool Moh. @abdool_moh]

“The issue of Terrorists celebrating sallah shouldn’t bother Nigerians, we are winning the war against terrorism” - General Abubakar Rabe in 2015.

Only to end up kidnapped & killed by terrorists 11 years later.
I hope Christopher Musa is watching.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

Another General dies in Terrorist captivity in Nigeria.

🤦🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♂️

[Defense News Nigeria @DefenseNigeria]

Terrible news.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

This man's antics are annoying but you see this one? 🤣😂🤣

Add that one with the native doctors where it is alleged that he challenged them to disappear from the jail cell and go free.

My Anambra friends, una wehdone oh!

[IGBO History & Facts @IgboHistoFacts]

Anambra State Government arrested alleged fake pastors and charged them to court. Gov. Soludo's bail condition? Heal one blind person and go home.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

@Starlink And yet, those of us who have the residential plans are blocked from subscribing unless we purchase the priority plan.

What gives, @Starlink?

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

Is this even real?

🤔🥴

[OurFaveOnlineDoc 🇬🇧 🇳🇬 @OurFavOnlineDoc]

178,457 firearms, 88,078 AK-47 rifles, and 3,900 assorted rifles are reported ALL MISSING under IG of Police Egbetokun.

In a country where police and the army are under-armed, you have “missing ammunition” and terrorists who are overarmed.

Do the maths.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣😂

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

Our VP demanded that our median resolution time hit 5 minutes by end of quarter.

Fine.

I created a new status called "Resolved (User Dependent)."

The second a ticket comes in, it gets that status and a message: "Issue fixed. If you're still experiencing problems, click this link."

The link goes to a 30-page Confluence article written entirely by ChatGPT at 2 a.m.

Somewhere in the middle of the article, there's a button that says "Still Broken." That button finally reopens the ticket.

Average user attention span? About 90 seconds.

Nobody makes it to the button.

Our dashboard thinks we’re repairing reality in under 2 minutes.

In actuality, we're just hiding the fire behind a very long scroll.

If productivity is an illusion, so is customer service.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

Yikes!

[Ricardo @Ric_RTP]

Microsoft just banned its own engineers from using AI.

The tool was literally costing MORE than the humans it was supposed to replace.

They lied to you about AI adoption and now the whole narrative is blowing up:

Microsoft gave thousands of engineers access to Claude Code six months ago and encouraged them to use it.

Engineers loved it and adoption exploded. But then the invoices arrived.

Token-based pricing means every query, every code review, every debugging session costs money. At scale across 100,000 engineers, the numbers became so large that Microsoft issued an internal order to cancel nearly all Claude Code licenses by end of June and force everyone onto their own cheaper tool instead.

The company that invested $5 billion in Anthropic just told its own people to stop using Anthropic's product because it costs too much.

Uber's story is even worse...

Their CTO Praveen Neppalli Naga told The Information that the budget he planned for the full year was "blown away already" by April.

Uber had rolled out Claude Code in December 2025. By March, 84% of their 5,000 engineers were using it with 70% of all committed code coming from AI systems.

Heavy users were burning $500 to $2,000 per month each. Naga himself spent $1,200 in a single two-hour demo session.

The company had even built internal leaderboards ranking engineers by how much AI they used. They literally gamified the spending and then ran out of money.

Now look at what Nvidia's own VP of applied deep learning Bryan Catanzaro said to Axios last month. Direct quote:

"For my team, the cost of compute is far beyond the costs of the employees."

This is a VP at the company that SELLS the chips saying that using AI is more expensive than paying humans.

Think about what this means for the entire AI narrative.

Every CEO on every earnings call for the past two years has said the same thing:

AI will make us more efficient, reduce headcount, and cut costs.

The stock market rewarded every company that said it.

Fired workers, stock goes up. Announced AI adoption, stock goes up.

But the actual companies deploying AI at scale are discovering the math doesn't work. The MORE employees use AI, the HIGHER the bill.

Goldman Sachs forecasts a 24x increase in token consumption by 2030 as companies adopt AI agents. Gartner just published a report showing that even though individual token prices will drop 90% by 2030, total enterprise AI costs will go UP because agents consume exponentially more tokens per task than basic tools.

Meta built an internal dashboard called "Claudeonomics" to track which employees use the most AI. Amazon started pushing engineers to "tokenmaxx," their internal term for consuming as many AI tokens as possible.

Both companies are spending hundreds of billions on AI infrastructure this year alone.

And Microsoft, the company that bet its entire future on AI, just told 100,000 engineers to stop using the tool they liked best because the per-token bills got out of control.

The companies building AI are telling investors it saves money. The companies using AI are finding out it costs more than the humans it was supposed to replace. And even the company that makes the chips just admitted it through its own VP.

This is the gap nobody on Wall Street is pricing in.

$725 billion in AI infrastructure spending this year across Big Tech. And the first companies to actually deploy these tools at scale are already pulling back because the economics don't work.

What do you think?

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

Why are so-called police officers handling alleged illicit arms without gloves?

What happened to forensic investigations and the preservation of evidence? Shouldn't there be an attempt to lift prints off those items?

[CrownprinceCom2 @CrownprinceCom2]

Don't say anything just repost 😭

Disturbing video showing heavy assault rifles allegedly brought into the country by foreigners. May this country never be hijacked by outsiders.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

Interesting read. Helpful.

[Akintola Steve @Akintola_steve]

Friday night.
11:48 PM.
Payment successful.
Customer debited.
But the vendor never got the order.

Support line starts blowing up.
The CEO is calling engineers.
The finance team is confused.
And the funniest part?
The payment service actually worked perfectly fine.

[Tomori @otomporo8701]

A drunk policeman shot me at a checkpoint in 2011.
The bullet tore through my car, through my right hand.

I lost my career as an animator. My marriage cracked. My mind still bleeds.

The twist?
I sued the Nigeria Police. Won in 2015.
Judge said: "Pay his medical bills."

10 years later. Zero naira.
I face permanent disability without help.
@PoliceNG_CRU @TunjiDisu1 @UNDP @NhrcNigeria
#NigeriaPoliceNotYourFriend

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣😂

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

Our CTO asked for a “single pane of glass dashboard” that shows literally everything happening in IT.

I told him that’s impossible without significant architecture changes and at least 2 new platforms.

That’s a lie.

I already have a single pane of glass: it’s a browser tab with our monitoring tool and 10 custom filters.

If he got access, he’d start asking questions like “why is CPU at 92% here” and “what’s this alert.”

Then I’d have to explain, and explaining is unpaid emotional labor.

So I built him a fake dashboard in PowerPoint.

The graphs are just animated GIFs looping the same fake data forever.

He stares at it in meetings and says things like “I can see our resilience story improving in real time.”

Everyone is dumb except me.

I should get a raise.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

We have a strict 50GB storage quota for the marketing department's shared drive.

The VP of marketing constantly maxes it out by backing up 4K drone footage.

He refuses to delete anything because it might be needed for a future campaign.

I am not requesting additional SAN storage from finance for B-roll footage of a parking lot.

So I wrote a simple macro.

Every night at 2 AM, it finds his largest video files and gradually lowers the resolution by 10%.

It has been running for 6 months.

His oldest drone videos now look like they were filmed on a flip phone from 2004.

He opened a ticket yesterday complaining about critical file corruption.

I told him the magnetic platters on the server are wearing thin from excessive large-file retention.

I warned him that if he doesn't delete the degraded files, the server will implode.

He spent his entire weekend frantically deleting terabytes of video.

I've saved the company $10k in hardware upgrades.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

We had a legit security alert pop up: suspicious logins from another country.

The SOC email came in flagged high priority with about 6 paragraphs of detail.

I read the subject line, stared for 2 seconds, and minimized it.

Security stuff means investigations, meetings, and “collaboration.”

None of that closes a ticket in under 10 minutes.

In my queue, someone wanted their desktop icons “rearranged nicely.”

I remoted in, dragged 3 icons into a folder, typed 2 sentences, and slammed that Resolve button.

Then I knocked out a batch of “can’t find VPN shortcut” requests.

By the time security looped in half the company, I was already above my daily closure target.

Heroism is optional. Metrics are mandatory.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

Lol.

Someone should check on Karen.

[Karen Resorcé @hr_unhinged]

I cannot believe a candidate actually asked me for the guest network password today.

We were settling into the glass conference room for a data analyst interview.

He opened his laptop and casually requested our Wi-Fi credentials to load his presentation.

I asked him why he felt entitled to our bandwidth before signing an NDA.

I told him that relying on external connectivity demonstrates a terrifying lack of offline preparedness.

If the internet goes down, does his value as an employee vanish with it?

I slammed his laptop shut and escorted him to the elevator.

He will not be working here.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

"...dirt and financial ruin."

😅🤣😅🤣😂

[IT Unprofessional @it_unprofession]

Is there a support group for people who panic-buy artisanal pastries?

I just walked into a bakery that looks like a minimalist art gallery.

There were no price tags on anything.

Just a single, glowing glass case containing 4 croissants resting on velvet pillows.

The cashier was wearing a beanie indoors and looked aggressively bored by my presence.

He asked if I wanted the yuzu-infused cruffin or the fermented sourdough knot.

I panicked and pointed to a brown square that looked vaguely like a brownie.

He nodded and typed furiously on a sleek iPad.

He spun the screen around to reveal a total of $14.

For a square of baked flour.

I tapped my card while making direct eye contact to show I wasn't intimidated by luxury carbohydrates.

The iPad then asked me for a 25% tip.

I tipped him for the privilege of handing me a paper bag.

I ate the square in my car in absolute silence.

It tasted like dirt and financial ruin.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣

[IT Unprofessional @it_unprofession]

The monthly automated email from IT demanding a password update just ruined my morning.

The system requires 12 characters, a number, an uppercase letter, and a blood sacrifice.

I can no longer use any of my previous 24 passwords.

I've already cycled through the names of my pets, my childhood street, and my favorite bands.

I am officially out of personal lore to secure my access to the company HR portal.

I tried "LetMeIn123!" but the system flagged it as a security risk.

Apparently, I need a special character that isn't a punctuation mark.

What does that even mean?

Do they want me to insert a hieroglyph?

I spent 20 minutes smashing my keyboard until it accepted a string of absolute gibberish.

Now I have a random string of letters written on a sticky note attached directly to my monitor.

I've successfully protected the company data from Russian hackers but made it fully accessible to the janitorial staff.

Next month I'm just going to quit.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣

[IT Unprofessional @it_unprofession]

We just spent the first 20 minutes of our all-hands meeting doing an icebreaker.

The prompt was to share a fun fact about ourselves that has nothing to do with work.

I despise fun facts.

My adult life is just a series of Outlook calendar invites and trying to decide what to thaw for dinner.

I don't have a fun fact.

The guy before me casually mentioned he reached base camp at Everest.

The woman after him rescues retired racing greyhounds.

When the spotlight finally hit my square on Zoom, my brain completely short-circuited.

I stared dead into the webcam and said I have double-jointed thumbs.

I do not have double-jointed thumbs.

The CEO immediately asked me to show the team.

I had to awkwardly bend my thumb backward until my knuckle physically popped.

Now I have a minor sprain and an ice pack on my hand.

I'm going to tell HR that mandatory team building is a worker's comp liability.

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

Our COO sent me a Slack: “Laptop is dead, nothing works, fix ASAP.”

I checked the monitoring tool.

His battery was at 1% and the charger wasn’t plugged in.

I could’ve just messaged: “Plug it in.”

Instead I opened a ticket, categorized it as a Severity 2 Power Incident.

Asked him for screenshots of the problem.

He sent a photo of a black screen.

I scheduled a remote session for 30 minutes later “to run diagnostics.”

At minute 29 I told him to verify his power source as Step 1 of the troubleshooting script.

He plugged it in.

Laptop turned on.

I documented the resolution as “User Education: Introduced to Concept of Electricity.”

The ticket remains a permanent part of his audit trail.

For “trend analysis.”

[#RedAlert 🇳🇬 @bravomike67]

🤣

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

Someone from HR messaged: “Printer is out of ink again, this is impacting critical processes.”

Critical processes = printing horoscope worksheets for “Wellness Wednesday.”

I checked the supply cabinet.

Plenty of toner.

Instead of dropping one off, I replied with the form link for “Justification of Physical Output.”

It’s 3 pages.

Section 2 asks, “Why can’t this stay digital?”

She wrote: “People like to color them in.”

I rejected the request as “non-essential consumption of consumables.”

She escalated to my manager.

I told him HR was trying to bypass our “Green Printing Initiative.”

There is no initiative.

He backed me anyway because toner is expensive.

An hour later she invited me to present “Sustainable IT” at Wellness Wednesday.

I accepted.

I’m making the slides grayscale on purpose.