@lewdlexiaudios Also function as biometric emergency brakes; when you’re sliding down a banister you shouldn’t be on, their high-friction surface area is the only thing standing between you and an expensive drywall repair. They're just organic noise-canceling headphones for your digestive system
@lewdlexiaudios FROM THE BUTT BIBLE:
Buttcheeks are the body’s built-in acoustic dampeners, specifically engineered by evolution to transform what would be a terrifying, high-velocity wind tunnel blast into a whimsical, rhythmic "pffft."