Brandon

Jacked up on Mountain Dew

[wiLL @willfulchaos]

job i applied for 3 months ago just sent me a rejection letter

[santos 🇲🇽 @svntsimo]

suddenly every gay has méxico jersey and loves soccer

[kat @yslnadi]

When it's eight in the morning and everything seems possible, but now it's four in the afternoon and there is nothing left that can be done

[sean yoo @SeanYoo]

i hate him so much but he’s legitimately one of the funniest people on the planet. incredible timing

[Terry O'Connor @tf_oconnor]

i need my next 3 years to look exactly like this btw

[gal౨ৎ @prtygal777]

4 years old beekeeper distracted by a roly poly

[sofia @soffiigz]

un día recorreré Italia de punta a punta con el amor de mi vida

[Nathan ✰ @Just1Nathann_]

Nah. 27-33 aren't your humbling years. They're your awakening years.

So many people misunderstand this phase of life.

That's when you start seeing things clearly. Everything suddenly dawns on you. You realize what you want, what doesn't matter, and how much time you've wasted.

Some people mistake that clarity for failure because they wish they had figured it out earlier.

But if you're determined, you can build more in those few years than you did in your entire early twenties.

[swagner @BayouBikeyBoi]

A new CEO of chevron has been selected

[Dr. Neighborhood Publicist @nhoodpublicist]

The ironic part about every compliment we’ve gotten about the World Cup is what the guests are falling in love with is Diversity. It’s the thing that actually makes this place worth staying in and why we can’t allow it to be destroyed.

[Andy Malafarina @andymalafarina]

All the pajama pants at Walmart were at half mast today.

[daft ponk @sicksadchris]

saying "i heard this live" when a song comes on

[tom @pricesandvices]

Sad day for people who know the price for scrap metal

[Andy Wang🕊 @andysvibe]

You are one vibrational shift away from manifesting everything you ever wanted

[Happy Captain @EODHappyCaptain]

That’s it ladies and gentlemen. He’s experienced baseball.

He’s an honorary American now.

[osama @0ba0sama]

thinking abt how im part of the 4% of the population that saw the bathtub scene before they removed it

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

Commercial advertising, product placements, and corporate-sponsored promotions are explicitly prohibited on national parklands. The White House lawn is a unit of the National Park System. It also violates standard Anti-Vending and Solicitation Laws as well as misuse of public funds and government endorsement ethics. Everything this administration does spits in the face of our laws. Everything is a grift.

[Beefsteak 🐄 @ol_scarbrain]

My daughter’s (4th grade) teacher paid out of her own pocket for my daughter’s class to have a “fun” last field trip because of budget cuts in the school system. On a teacher’s salary. Because she loves her students. Tracy should eat shit, maybe.

[˖ Ridhima 𓂀 ݁˖ @ridhima_z]

The reason margaritas taste so good is because they are a spiritually safe drink

They have a salt circle that wards off evil

[lindsey ok @lindseyyok]

I thought they canceled bud light for being too woke. I cannot keep up