Elias “Two-Face” Phillips

SMU ‘92 Alum 🐎| Former ΠΚΑ President | Sophie Cunningham stalker | 0-4 in fights | Bonnie Blue survivor

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Get minter up and moving #nikkicapocci

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Lord if you can hear me right now, please put some blonde Tri delt in my math class today 🙏

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Ex wife dyed her hair ginger. Counting that as a win for the program

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

You think she will notice ?
#fullsend

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Does anyone want to know the weather in Frisco Texas?

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

@MarcoBelchoir Beers.

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

I love beer

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

@EN0CX Ohhh noooo boobs

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Got kicked out the bar so I decided to watch a white boy get some motion @daddy

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Amen

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

First day on campus and some freshman already gave me an sti

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

My boy just said he is having a beer with his new roommate… I FEEL BETRAYED, CHEATED, DOUBLE CROSSED. THAT SHOULD BE ME #fuckyou

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

@MikeHawkUSA Send me to the freshman dorms now.

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Im ready for class now

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

There’s a freshman who’s been saving herself just for you. Let em have it

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Last night before I leave for school. Let’s have ourselves a night fellas

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

I hope I get the “I’m pregnant” text from her just to talk to her again #lank #fuckthetide

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Just found my new favorite news network. #isreal

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Yeah mom i definitely want to go watch the new spider man while im getting ghosted by my ex. #netyahu

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Half way thru my first Ella Langley beer and I already got the beer shits

[Elias “Two-Face” Phillips @BruceLebatman]

Take me to the ocean baby
#beachbum #whiteprivilege