atomspaz

asynchronous

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

This is EXACTLY why I keep telling guys:

Sleep with her on the 1st date.

You must try.

If you failed, you HAVE to move on.

You don't leave that shit dangling with false hope and rosy expectations.

You gave it a shot, it didn't work, you move on.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

REGARDLESS of what women say:

If we're ANYTHING LESS than a horndog around them, they lose interest. PERIOD.

They dry up SO FAST if you become exactly the guy they CLAIM they're attracted to.

Always err on the side of being physically aggressive, escalate early and often, even and especially on first dates.

Touch her, hold her hand, kiss her cheek, kiss her lips.

That's the only way to do it.

If she doesn't play ball, SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU AND JUST WANTS TO USE YOU FOR HER OWN AGENDAS.

Bail out and move on.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

Dear women:

Just because a guy tries to sleep with you soon, doesn't mean he's looking for a hookup.

If you think that, you just hookupzoned yourself for no reason.

Why do you think guys test for sexual compliance early?

Simple. He wants to make sure you're not a carrot dangler.

Hell he wants to make sure you're not going to be a carrot dangler 5-10 years into the relationship.

How you behave on Day 1 will only be amplified on Day 1,000 and beyond.

Guys know this, and hence this is why we check for this very early.

Get your trauma fixed and go "heal," you ran-through pumped-and-dumped losers.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

Dear women:

Just because a man wants to sleep with you on the first date doesn't mean he's looking for a hookup.

He could be looking for a long-term relationship.

You women can't process this for some reason.

Probably have been pumped and dumped so much that you've become paranoid, disillusioned, and highly distrustful of men.

The fact is every man would love to have a long-term relationship with the right woman.

What he DOESN'T want to do is enter into a long-term relationship where he's made to wait for/earn intimacy like a dog by a woman who's clearly not physically attracted to him.

It just sets such a terrible precedent and establishes the wrong frame from the outset.

He KNOWS that that kind of unrequited, lopsided dynamics can only lead to a dead bedroom in 1-2 years, but by then he's already stuck.

Can you blame him for not being enthused about jumping through your silly hoops just to cater to your past trauma?

He's looking for your genuine desire, which is the ONLY foundation worth a damn for building a happy, sustainable long-term relationship.

Is that really so much to ask for?

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

"Hookups are meaningless and make you feel empty."

First of all, you're not that guy, don't pretend you know what it's like to have volume and abundance.

You have no freaking idea.

Second, you know there's a middle ground right?

You don't have to get married if you don't want to do hookups.

It isn't binary, you can have deep connection and meaningful relationships without marriage.

Just get a girlfriend.

If she pressures you for marriage, get rid of her and get another one.

While you may not be able to get consistent hookups, surely you have it in you to just get another girlfriend?

It shouldn't be that hard EVEN for the average guy, so do that.

Be serially monogamous.

Get all the pair-bonding you want, without legally and financially castrating yourself into becoming a woman's slave and eunuch.

Problem solved!

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

Genuine desire or bust.

Non-negotiable.

And in practice, this means first-date lays only.

Once she makes you wait, she doesn't have genuine desire for you.

Women show their cards very early in the game and give you a preview of what it'll be like in the next 10-20 years with her ON THE FIRST DATE.

It's up to us whether to perk up our ears and pick up the signals or not.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

A woman's lust for you is her love for you.

If she doesn't have lust for you, she doesn't love you.

Regardless of how many times she repeats "I love you" to convince both you and herself alike.

Wake up already.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

Loveless marriages are the norm, not the exception.

[female natured @femalenatured]

"Genuinely attracted" is a heuristic dating strategy that keeps you from wasting your time with girls who are time-wasters.

It's a positive expected value (+EV) mating strategy to assume if a woman isn't sexually compliant, she isn't interested.

Because what's the alternative?

Doing a monkey dance to try and make her interested?

As far as you're concerned she isn't interested.

And just because she's in front of you does NOT mean she is "genuinely attracted" to you.

Takes sexual action to confirm her genuine interest.

And the longer you wait the more she loses respect for you.

Damned if you do and damned if you don't.

Much simpler to replace her with a girl who's already showing high indicators of interest, chasing, and on the same page from the jump.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

Only low-value women are afraid of sleeping with the guy on the first date.

They know from experience that the guy almost always disappears after sex (this, by the way, isn't a universal experience).

This isn't really an indictment of the guy, but this is a symptom that she's not offering anything other than sex.

In fact, she's probably offering negative value in addition to sex (meaning the guy slept with her despite her personality, not because of).

If she brings more to the table (and it doesn't even take much, just be pleasant for starters), there's basically no way that the guy will just ghost her after having sex with her.

Only low-value women get pumped and dumped.

Because of that, they associate having sex with the guy with getting dumped.

It's a phobia/defense mechanism that low-value women develop over time.

So now they try to withhold sex as long as possible with every guy out there, thinking that it would get them commitment.

Most guys will not wait, a few inexperienced ones will wait (with resentment building up in the meantime), and, when they finally have sex with her, they dump her too out of spite.

So the woman is back at square one again, but now with more wrinkles, more emotional baggage, and fewer fertile eggs.

Some women try to enact a "no sex until marriage" rule to protect against this, but honestly I haven't heard of 1 instance where this has ever worked.

Which means that even the simpiest of simps know that that's a retarded deal to even entertain.

The truth is most happy relationships and marriages start out with both parties getting intimate pretty fast.

This will be mind-blowing to low-value women who are used to nothing but pump-and-dump.

When you think about it logically, it makes sense too.

When there's genuine desire on both sides, intimacy flows naturally.

And when intimacy flows naturally, both parties are more likely to want to see each other again. And again. And again.

That is how a long-term relationship starts and indeed sustains itself.

High-value women never worry about sleeping with guys on the first date if there's chemistry.

They KNOW the risk of the guy just disappearing is very low -- they're confident in retaining the guy just based off the strength of their personality, their demeanor, and the overall package of what they bring to the table.

They know the guy can't just find what they're offering anywhere else easily.

Low-value women find it very hard to believe that there are women out there who sleep with the guy on the first date and STILL managed to marry him at the end -- it blows their minds.

Because ultimately getting dumped isn't a function of how soon you sleep with the guy.

It's a function of how much (or little) value you bring to his life.

[atomspaz @bryan_2u]

@therealjayber bet she will ghost you 😅 why aren't you inviting her over already? 🤭

[Tio @tiotheo01]

Required viewing for anyone who thinks he wants to get married.

Great relationship advice from a divorce lawyer of all people.

https://t.co/eQh4pfJ0IK

[atomspaz @bryan_2u]

@therealjayber @wilbertliu could you resend it to me too? I tried suscribing to a while ago but didnt recieve anything ever since.

[Wealth • Health • Mindset @zen_mindset]

Affirm :

I choose happiness for my day.

My day is full of possibilities and potential.

My day is a blessing and a gift that I will not waste.

[atomspaz @bryan_2u]

I was browsing for a new phone, was looking at the Pixel phone and notice the Japan set was significantly cheaper. Found out it is because you can not turn off the camera shutter sound...

[Ali Abdaal @AliAbdaal]

How to be more intentional with your time:

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

If you ask yourself what has actually made you happy in the past, you would have one set of answers.

Yet if you ask yourself what will make you happy in the future, you would probably have a different set of answers.

Let me tell you...

I don't think you're correct.

[Aruvin 💊 @aruvinchan]

If you think you can tackle 2 big things at once, you're probably wrong.

You can't fight a war on 2 fronts and expect to win both.

The back-and-forth context-switching alone will kill you.

So focus on one thing at a time.

Sometimes in life you just have to make a choice.

[Ali Abdaal @AliAbdaal]

if I’m struggling with procrastination, I try to just lower the bar of what I need to do

[atomspaz @bryan_2u]

What the

[jerry @jerryhadid]

I’m in tears…