Jess

clumsy protagonist

[Andrea Pitzer @andreapitzer]

Please, I beg you, ask yourself if you are really a nuclear-power-plant-on-fire expert before you commit to that tweet.

[BRollo Tomassi 🇺🇸 @sirbroll]

@coolheavychevy @JenGriffinFNC

[Jess @butmetho]

Tag yourself I’m Loathsome Dung Eater

[Jess @butmetho]

Help I cannot stop buying cute little white outfits

[Jess @butmetho]

Getting a thigh tattoo in the winter means I have no choice to but wear sweatpants for weeks oh no

[Jess @butmetho]

Stress level: Crying at the gym

[Jess @butmetho]

How I Met Your Father takes place in a fictional 2022 where people play mouth jenga

[Jess @butmetho]

Wordle 209 3/6

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[Jess @butmetho]

Always having a tiny nervous breakdown when I share my dumb art on the internet!

[Jess @butmetho]

Battlebots rules

[Jess @butmetho]

I think it’s a pretty bad sign when have to sage your date before he proposes #TheBachelorette

[Jess @butmetho]

It seems stressful that in order to give myself peace of mind about potentially having covid, I have to stand on line for hours with dozens of people who also might have covid.

[Jess @butmetho]

Kicked of 33 with a weird workout next to the woodpile in my parents garage but I’m feeling pretty pretty good

[Jess @butmetho]

Had a pretty impressive visitor outside our place today!

[Jess @butmetho]

God I love marathon day

[Jess @butmetho]

Please enjoy this photo of me bursting into tears I promise I’m actually extremely happy!

[Jess @butmetho]

@crankykale Ugh 💔 one of the greats. Kevin and I met there on our first date. So so so sad to see it go

[Jess @butmetho]

Weird how I can be both super insecure about my body and simultaneously tempted to buy an extremely small bikini!!

[Jess @butmetho]

@ravenscimaven He definitely isn’t sold on getting out of bed

[Jess @butmetho]

On my way home from karaoke in Manhattan at 4am. sometimes this year it was easy to forget that I live in this city but dang I love New York