Unfortunately, I have to admit that I have not done my best. My current situation is a direct consequence of my incompetence. I suck at doing this life thing.
The moment you lose a parent, there comes a point where you start measuring every pain against that loss and nothing ever feels as painful, you end up responding to life with a kind of nonchalance not because you don’t care, but because you’ve already survived the worst.
I just want my whole nervous system to finally rest in 2026. I want my heart to stop racing every day, I want to get out of that constant fight-or-flight mode, and I just want real peace. I’m begging for a year where my spirit can breathe, my mind can slow down, and my life finally makes sense along with the people that’s in it.