Caleb McClelland

cockblock king.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

SMH I got an among us reference in my dream.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Mark my words, I will become entirely forehead. Mark. My. Words.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

When they call you by a cute pet name:

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Is it possible to OD on crocodile rock?

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I’m playing mariokart at work, I am thriving.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

The world may be my oyster, but I think I’m allergic to shellfish.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I know churros are supposed to be good, but every time I see one I just think “sugary turd.”

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I’ve gotten really good at frowning.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I hate igtv if you send me a vid of it there is 120% chance I won’t watch it.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

@jacklhouser Strawberries are my favorite berries.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I just had the best food I have ever tasted.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Oo imma lil mad.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Comedy before dignity darling, comedy before dignity.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I flew a kite.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I’m gonna fly a kite.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Please please please stop adoring Micheal Scott, he made the office a hostile environment with everything he did.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I think the puppet master got my strings tangled up.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Just took an IQ test, and not tryna brag or anything but I made it to double digits.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

I have an album of selfies titled “single guy selfies” in which each photo emphasizes my singularity.

[Caleb McClelland @calebjmac]

Oh to be a ladybug happily munching on aphids for the rest of my days