I thought it would fade by midday. It didn’t.
But I guess this is where I remind myself, this too shall pass… even if joy hasn’t found me till this morning
Some days are tough. Some mornings are even tougher… but usually, as the hours pass, it softens. By evening, I find my way back to a little happiness.
Yesterday didn’t follow that script………
That question “who do you want to let go?” even if my boss, said no one, we all know how these things go.
And just like that, the weight doubled.
Since then, it hasn’t really lifted. If anything, it’s gotten heavier with every passing hour.
I woke up at 5:57am already heavy, one thought stuck on replay: am I doing enough to become successful, to be wealthy, to be comfortable?
Got to work, first meeting of the day… and it’s about downsizing.
A calculative human’s odyssey
What’s it like being a calculative human? they asked.
I responded and said it’s like having your entire life planned out in your head with plan A, B,C,D and even plan E. I know you are gonna ask how is that even possible.
Literally went back to the drawing board and the drawings were not forming shapes at all for the very first time.
In that moment I realized my calculations meant nothing to life, they were just walls I built to shield myself.