The International Man of Misery

I have popped too many corks to let you dorks offend me.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Just had the lousiest @ChipotleTweets ever :/

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@Pkittass You sound dumb tbh

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Looks like Norway is rowing their asses home. 😂

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Brazil lost bc they didn’t have a Joao Pedro on their roster.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@ivybnnuy And the audacity to say they caught me off guard too.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@DaygoBam @PokeDailyPost The one in the center might know leaf blade or grass knot

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Decembers in south Texas are strange cause it’s 70 degrees, the leaves are falling, and my ass is sweaty.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Fuck this marathon. I just had to take a twenty minute detour home

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Cuz she’s not good at singing, ???

[𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐏𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 @Matt_Pinner]

JLo is 56 years old, why is she still dressing like this on stage??

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Although I appreciate the effort, I really wish my baby toe would give up producing toes nails for that one.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@sab_magic Maybe some daiquiris, queen?

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@sunnydr0pdraws PLA had such better options. The shoe and shirt options are awful.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@V1nn_r @sunnydr0pdraws Where did you get the mariachi suit?

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@interesting_aIl No that’s a high quantity jacket

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@excelduru Marmaduke

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

The body might be tea but the mind is certainly mush.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@sinnoh_CEO Based

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

@sab_magic Cuuuuuute

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

I like to smoke my joints like Johnny Sac from The Sopranos.

[The International Man of Misery @calvineaux]

Bob Seger is badass