the best part of plane travel is that they are one of the last frontiers of our world that forcibly removes you β even if just for a few hours β from the relentless mindflaying of the compulsion to be terminally online
if you cannot rejoice, let alone survive, a mere 9.5 hours without needing to check your stupid little phone for "work emails" or scroll short-form vertical video content you should throw yourself into the engine of the next plane you board
HELP: We are seeking the pubics assistance locating this man that dispensed a fountain Busch Light without providing ID this morning. When confronted, he threw a $5 bill at our cashier and ran out the door.
Even if your child is doing your beer run for you, it is still required for them to show your ID to an employee. If located, please notify us so we can give him back his $2.00 in change.