smurph

[smurph @capnleaky]

Why do I have trouble remembering people names but I ALWAYS retain a dogs name

[smurph @capnleaky]

I hate it here

[smurph @capnleaky]

WiFi with threatening aura

[Meg @megannn_lynne]

got my sticker!!!!

[smurph @capnleaky]

Brb getting all my friends addicted to Mario party

[smurph @capnleaky]

My insta has officially started recommending music over scantily clad women. Hell yeah

[smurph @capnleaky]

Insta sl*t purge completed, gotta clean up that TL…. Twt on the other hand is a lost cause

[smurph @capnleaky]

Hooked on the cheddah

[smurph @capnleaky]

I never thought I would come to a point where I buy pants and I am mad because they fit perfectly 🙄

[smurph @capnleaky]

Sometimes you just need to set aside time to be stinky all by yourself

[smurph @capnleaky]

Speak up for yourself, believe in yourself and don’t give up. If you cannot do these things for yourself, then why should anyone else? It will not always be easy, because life is a challenge.

[smurph @capnleaky]

Having a girlfriend is like if you had a house plant that needs to be watered and you ask if you can water it but it says no

[smurph @capnleaky]

If your partner snores/hiccups incredibly loud in their sleep is that a dealbreaker? Kinda hate wearing earplugs to bed 😅

[smurph @capnleaky]

Going to the grocery store and peeling off a single ripe 🍌 banana to eat today makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong #BanannaHeist

[Science girl @sciencegirl]

A look inside a VCR

[smurph @capnleaky]

Stardew stardew stardew

[smurph @capnleaky]

@sleeepiest

[smurph @capnleaky]

I want a dog best friend so BAD