I work in an office and whenever I need a new pencil I go to the stationary cupboard and get one. They don't know I take them home. I must have taken 3 or 4 pencils home this year. I don't even need all the pencils, one of them is just a spare.
yesterday at work, i said to my friend “i have to get home to my son” and a guy turned out and went “you have a son?! i didn’t know that!” and then i had to awkwardly tell him when i said son - i was referring to my 6 month old kitten