A woman in my area refused to let her husband touch her salary for eight years.
She always said couples should keep their finances separate.
Her husband never argued.
Last month, he lost his job.
For the first time, he asked her to handle the bills until he got back on his feet.
She said no.
Three days later, he sold the house and disappeared.
She found out it had always been in his name.
He left her with their 3 children. 👀
@AmeboWithMoh The selfishness in some women is alarming,
This mentality needs to end.
Saw a post where a woman refused to pay for treatment for her child despite have 10x the amount needed because the husband couldn't raise the money.
What men are going through in Nigeria isn't marriage o
One of my friends said, "you have interesting view about marriage. But we know you to be a generous person. You don't even know how to be unkind. All this one you are forming that your woman will invest her money in the home, we know she will enjoy your money. Your guys and people you don't even know are enjoying your kindness. Haba!"
I just smiled and explained to him. I'll write down what I told him.
You are looking at it monetarily. It is not about money. I don't have any attachment to money. The only reason I want to be rich is to expand my reach of kindness. If I'm always kind to strangers and friends, then you should know my partner is enjoying my money too. But it is not about money, it is about commitment. Whether I need her money or not, is irrelevant. Her money must be invested in the home the way mine is invested in the home. I'll eat her money the way she is eating my money. The point is, where your money is, that is where your heart is. You cannot buy love and commitment by footing all the bills. Someone who isn't giving to you habitually, is not in love with you. It is not a male attribute to give, it is a love attribute. Odogwu is not a flex. The whole point of marriage, is to do life together.
Everything I have belongs to her and the kids. If she doesn't know that, it is disappointing. Remember the story of the prodigal son? The one that stayed with the father was angry the father forgave the prodigal son because he didnt know that everything the father had, belonged to him.
1. "She is stingy ooo. But I still love her."
I have no pity for him. It did not begin that day. He just didn't expect it to be that ridiculous.
2. "Take care of your woman. When the chips are down, she will take care of you."
Somebody who is not actively taking responsibility side by side with you, but choosing to keep her money and remain dependent on you, will not magically become responsible when the chips are down. Let your woman take financial responsibility with you from the beginning so she gets used to it.
Please marry right.
A man divorced his wife because she had ₦600k in her account but couldn't pay ₦24k for their daughter's treatment.
She almost died.
I used to know a woman like this. She and her husband were civil servants and were earning averagely the same salary. Yet, the woman put everything on the man. No support at all. If it was the man that told me, one would have assumed he's lying, but it's their daughter.
Wr attended the same school then. Whenever she's sent home for not paying school fees, the father rallies whatever he can get and pays. If she gets sent out the following week, there's nothing the father could do until next salary comes. The mother on the other hand held on to her own money, doesn't even lend it out to the father for this purpose. However, according to the daughter, she's the first to buy clothes and others for parties.
The daughter is now in the UK and she takes care of the mother very well. Sometimes, I think she has forgotten what the mother did back then, which she told me herself. Sometimes, I just shrug and say "At the end of the day, her mother is her mother"