Jeff Michael

Never forget that the first and clearest example of common sense is that the earth is flat and the sky revolves around it.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

“Music was originally discreet, seamless, simple, masculine, and of good morals. Have not the moderns rendered it lascivious beyond measure?” — Jacobus of Liége, ca. 1300

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

The Lion of Conservative Thought, the Terror Of Socialists Everywhere outlining his free-market small-government core principles.

[Reuters @Reuters]

President Trump announced plans to meet AI executives, saying firms might ‘give back’ to the public in a way that enriches Americans https://t.co/ZdBRuGkOw3

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

You mean to tell me that this Giant Of Business Acumen, this Titan of Conservative Thought, has been unable to undo in two years the damage that doddering old Sleepy Joe could autopen in four? That Very Smart Donald couldn’t fix Very Dumb Joe’s mess on Day 1?

Interesting.

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

WARNOCK: Right now somebody is trying to buy groceries in Georgia and they can't afford it

BROOKE ROLLINS: Well, that's because of the Biden administation

WARNOCK: Two years later that's your answer? Because of the Biden administration?

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

Apologies in advance to any pieces of shit offended by the comparison.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

The ENTIRE point of that scene was the President angrily venting his most base urges, after which he talked it through with his chief of staff and came to a calmer conclusion. But sure, misrepresent the scene as justifying stopping at step one of that process, you piece of shit.

[The Washington Post @washingtonpost]

President Trump appeared to defend his latest military strikes on Iran by posting a short clip from “The West Wing,” the popular NBC television drama about a fictional U.S. president, in which the show’s characters debate their own military action. https://t.co/4xIsopz570

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

Is that new Freakout Factor open the one that @markdero7 said should never see the light of day? Because if so, he was right. And if not…WHAT DID THAT ONE LOOK LIKE? @RoFlo @LaurenShehadi #MLBCentral #donteatmysterycookies

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@JoshMalina COUNTING HAS A KNOWN LIBERAL BIAS.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

That’s a good looking @DanhausenAD mug @RootlessCoffee put together! Only one problem, though…

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

NYC has always been ahead of the curve on hating that loathsome slug turd.

[The Knicks Wall @TheKnicksWall]

Trump getting booed LOUDLY

🎥 @Krisplashed

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@FogartyJim @JohnFetterman @grahamformaine It sucks to have no choice whatsoever.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@Phillies That looked like that 1-6-3 putout the @Dodgers put together the other day.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@TMacPhils We stayed at the hotel once about ten years back. Neat! Except for the leaf blowers they used to clean the seating area with. Exhaust smell and that DRONE for what felt like a LOT of the night.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@RonFilipkowski He thrives on the hate as well as the love.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

And they’re masterfully rigged where Trump is involved, but any and every other race goes pretty much how everybody expected.

[John Collins @Logically_JC]

It’s so weird how the elections are only “rigged” when they lose.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@RackSpinner Loved the Longshot mini, hated when he got dragged into the X-Verse.

That ASM cover feels incomplete to me without the corresponding cover of Web Of Spider-Man 6.

I always wanted Alpha Flight to succeed…but I never bought an issue.

Madcap! Whatever happened to Madcap?

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@LaurenShehadi looking good on #MLBCentral today. You’re gonna sell a lot of cookies, I bet! @RoFlo @CliffFloyd30 @MLBNetwork

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

Whatever turns you on, dude.

https://t.co/YRCSHvrB9J

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

@ClassicGIJoe That’s the version I liked best. The face shield seemed more functional, and I liked that the blue color wasn’t identical toe the rank and file trooper and officer. The hood seemed unreliable in terms of line of sight.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

WHY DOES ANYBODY CARE? Why do we look to these walking talking pinups for rational thinking and moral guidance? Why do we want them to be upstanding humans? Why do we think they’re our friends? They’re mannequins, animatronics. You might as well ask the moon who it’s voting for.

[Yashar Ali 🐘 @yashar]

Gwyneth Paltrow says her husband is a progressive and that he “wants to make sure everybody’s looked after.”

Paltrow says that she’s “pretty centrist” and adds that her husband “thinks I’m a Republican.”

She says she’s not a Republican, but an independent, and that she doesn’t “feel anything right now…”

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

I mean, I KNOW I’m not good at baseball. But I don’t know how much worse I’d have done over three innings.

[Jeff Michael @CaptainDecoy]

Andrew Painter is…well, I think he might be not good at baseball.