A lot of people don't want to hear this, But the cold, hard truth that you need to accept is that they did what they did, and they left you the way they left you because they didn't care, they didn't have decent morals and values, and they were incapable of demonstrating any genuine level of empathy, compassion, or remorse. That's why they didn't feel bad about the position they left you in, that's why they didn't show any remorse after hurting you, and that's why they never apologized for it. Stop searching for answers to try and figure out why they did what they did, and start accepting that they did what they did because that's who they really are
CPTSD is not “something bad happened once.”
It is “something bad kept happening, and I had to become someone else to survive it.”
It comes from prolonged, repeated trauma, especially in relationships. Childhood emotional abuse. Narcissistic parenting. Chronic neglect. Coercive control. Being unsafe for a long time when escape was not possible.
The body stays on alert even when nothing is happening. Emotional flashbacks hit without images. You feel small, trapped, or worthless and do not know why. Identity forms around survival. Love gets learned as danger.
Fawn, freeze, hypervigilance, dissociation. These were intelligent adaptations. They are not character flaws.
Healing is not “moving on” or “just calming down.” It is building the safety the system never had, and learning what calm and “no” actually feel like.
Anyone who can't understand cutting of family has a privilege they should be grateful for; some parents and family members are abusers, destructive and downright evil - if someone has to cut off family, they need empathy not your smelly judgment.
Then there's me, who doesn't trust "family over everything" type of people. They are some of the most enabling and dangerous people you'll ever come across.
The fact that we hold loyalty to family in such high regard is indicative of a culture that enables abuse as a norm. Aside from "you don't know what people go through" (which is true), this mindset doesn't serve anyone but abusers
ppl who say stuff like this just let’s me know they ain’t never been thru no real, deep shit w their family and they should feel lucky they don’t understand lol