Sofa King Toxic

Christian, Husband, Father, Eagle Scout, Patriotic Army Veteran.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

Go DOGE!

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@kevinUSA100 @TeamTrump47 @BredsguardDalen The hot ones are welcome! 😜

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@EL4USA @pr0ud_americans 🙄

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@icecreamavfc @Porkchop_EXP @runaway_vol There is a >50% share of our citizens that crap all over any notion of American exceptionalism - mostly because Pres Donald J. Trump "huurts their widdle feewings". It's exhausting for true patriots.
It's refreshing to hear praise from visitors with no tie to our politics. Eat 💩

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@icecreamavfc @Porkchop_EXP @runaway_vol Which one are you talking about? I might not have followed her on X yet. Don't care about OF.
Now please excuse me. I have to go back to arguing with other X accounts about the war in Ukraine. That's way more enjoyable than hearing about how great our country is. Glaze me baby!

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@LawMedRNlegal1 You have love for your fellow man. He doesn't even love himself. Racking up "sick burns" on X is how he self-soothes.
God bless you!

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

An ode to biscuits & gravy... Brilliant writing. Maybe aided by or even 100% AI. Don't care.
A very entertaining follow.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A breakfast counter. The waitress recommended the biscuits and gravy, and when the plate arrived, I thought something had gone wrong in the kitchen.

I say this with shame. The dish looked like a construction site after rain. Pale mounds. Gray ladle-fall. Speckles I could not identify.

In my land, the eye eats first. A meal is arranged like a garden. This meal was arranged like weather.

"Is it… finished?" I asked, carefully.

"Honey, that's what it looks like."

The man beside me was already eating his. He did not look up. "Just try it."

I am a man who has charged hillsides at dawn. I raised the fork. I tried it.

I must now formally apologize to the biscuits, the gravy, the waitress, the kitchen, and the entire breakfast tradition of the American South.

It was magnificent. Warm. Peppered. The biscuit drank the gravy the way a field drinks rain — THAT is why it is shaped like that, you fool — and every mound I had insulted was a soft fold of comfort that my homeland, in eight hundred years, never once thought to invent.

"Well?" the waitress asked.

"I judged it," I confessed. "By its appearance. I am ashamed."

"Everybody does, hon."

Everybody does. A national dish that forgives you for doubting it. It expects the doubt. It waits for you on the other side of it.

Do not judge the gravy by its face. Judge yourself, for hesitating.

I order it every Saturday now. I no longer see the construction site. I see only the garden.

It was a garden the whole time. The eye must be trained.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@KAM4Texas @PhilMickelson Take up Pickleball. 😁

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@_CynthiaThurlow I have been a cardiac floor patient. It's SAD all the way, minus fat & salt. But plenty of refined starches & artificial ingredients.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@elsathora I put in a good word with "The Fellas" at @RuthlessPodcast to invite you on "The Progrum" & arrange a VIP 4th of July experience in our Nation's Capital. Sample their content on YouTube. You are mentioned in this episode:
https://t.co/LrdU1LhHie

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@Amer1can_Barbie You should have been in construction!

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@Pixie1z @sxdoc Eddy Haskell.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@so_phie_C Also Hollywood.
They make final edits on all of the big budget stuff still being made.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@YoAdrienne1968 Fellow alcoholic here. Health is not great & have really damaged my marriage with constant relapses, hiding my habit, gaslighting & lying to my wife.
Starting over again!

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@R30258Christine @AzPetrich @KYalliemaymay My reps ARE clueless too, but I am in the US.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@KYalliemaymay @AzPetrich I don't care to understand another fucking thing about the FEELINGS of the oppressors while they are abusing, raping, & murdering their own people. I'm kinda funny like that.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@Nessakins_ @LoneStarTexian Easy to make with some sourdough starter discard or active starter.
Is this your gateway drug to becoming a "trad wife" ?
A chicken coop & beehives can't be far behind.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@GretchenPSmith 40% tips are INSANE! Most wait staff at that kind of establishment will not bring all orders to the table at the same time, fuck up at least one order, cop an attitude about having to fix the incorrect order, then ignore you until they come back with the bill. 20% is too much.

[Sofa King Toxic @CarlF68]

@ZOrtiz9919 They want to be like you!