My brother has fully transitioned.
He's grown breasts, had his name changed, vocal surgery, and has been on estrogen for years.
I've lost my brother.
We're less than a year and a half apart in age and were very close our entire upbringing. It's a very difficult burden to bear.
I have written many posts, and even articles, on the sin of transgenderism, most of which were written before I knew of his transition. I've written how according to the Bible, God has made everyone male and female (Gen. 1:27), showing how our sex or gender cannot be changed or altered in any way and how attempting to do so is rebellion against our Creator.
But working through the challenges this presents personally has really opened my eyes to just how complex and confusing this sin is:
• Do we let our children be around their Uncle, or will this cause confusion?
• Do we refer to him by his preferred pronouns of she/her to show we love him, or refer to him by he/him, which he hates, since he's a man?
• Do we refer to him by his birth name, or his name he's gone by for close to a decade?
• How do I minister to my younger sister and mother, who struggle with what to do?
• Should my Christian sister permit him to wear a dress at her wedding?
• How do we minister to my brother's soul? How do we care for him and love on him as he's entangled in a world of deception?
• Most importantly, how do I glorify God and be faithful to him in this all?
I don't know all the answers, but what I do know is this: no matter how close to home a sin issue hits, we must be faithful to the Word of God regardless of the real-world consequences it may have.
I can't lie to him by calling him a woman.
Enforcing his false reality by calling him a name that isn't his isn't showing love, it's actually hatred.
And if I never share the truths of the Bible with him on this sin, then I'm doing him harm, even if he vehemently disagrees.
But cutting him off completely and not talking to him at all isn't the way, either. Nor is constantly bringing up the reality of his sin when he's already said he wants nothing to do with Christianity, lest I cast pearls before swine (Matt. 7:6).
My sin issues are messy enough. But I've hardly been more aware of how damaging sin can be to others than when it presents such a major interruption to the harmony of my family.
So what do I do now? How do I move forward?
I love him, even if that love must take place from an increased distance due to the gap caused by his sin.
I be a brother to him.
I set boundaries for the spiritual protection of my children.
I text him.
I urge my family members to not cave in to the unbiblical lies.
I call him.
And I pray for him. That he may experience the grace of God in Christ Jesus knowing that just like he currently is, I too used to be a lost sheep without the Shepherd. And if it weren't for the kindness of God to a wretch like me, I'd still be hopelessly pursuing a sinful lifestyle too. As God did for me, he can still radically change my brother from the inside out if he repents and places his trust in Jesus.
And even if my brother never does, I will still love him and love on him, as that is the calling the Lord has for me as a follower of Christ.
"Do not be deceived: No sexually immoral people, idolaters, adulterers, or males who have sex with males, no thieves, greedy people, drunkards, verbally abusive people, or swindlers will inherit God’s kingdom. And some of you used to be like this. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God." (1 Cor. 6:9-11)
“get that IDF band off the lineup or i’m not playing”
— Jane Remover threatens to pull out of M3F Fest after finding out that Temper City is included in the lineup.