Cass

I think I’m famous. I’m a leo. (obviously)

[2000s @PopCulture2000s]

me going to bed on an empty stomach bc i was too lazy to cook for myself

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

if anyone proposes at my wedding, I will have you escorted out by security.

[becca moore @becccamoore]

last night a 22 year old girl asked me how old I was and when I said 24 she said “what?! you look so young!” ok . first of all

[Noah Kahan @NoahKahan]

I don’t deserve this shit

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

alright fine, I’ll do it. I’ll join the bandwagon and watch the hunger games series on a random tuesday. thanks to no plans brought to you by netflix.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

retainers are like pacifiers for adults

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

no military men in 2023

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

@jillswannn I was unaware of this and now very unhappy. Get rid of friends or something. NOT my show.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

I bet you love the iPhone mini too

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

I don’t care how many mutual friends we have, don’t friend me. I’m not a Facebook type of bitch and I genuinely don’t care to know you and see your posts. *deletes request*

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

who knew virgin river was a book?

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

@jillswannn I was, in fact, at work…

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

I need a cigarette.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

how are you an adult male and blonde? ugly.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

I’m fucking sick and tired of men. Ugly men. Audacious men. Stupid men. I’m done with men.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

if you have a photo of your ex on your tinder, delete it. I do not care about her, but clearly you do.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

maybe I should tweet about my late flights more often… I jinxed myself (in a good way) and I will actually arrive on time?

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

I look forward to the one flight I take in the future that is actually on time.

[Cass @cassieswimmer]

the longer couples are together, the more they start to look like each other…