cat

i’m just cat now

[cat @catglum]

If you had told 15 year old me that I would be on the list at a death cab show one day I would have been soooo mind blown and excited and proud. Does anything maintain its majesty ? Its wonder and beauty ? What? Nature? The perplexity of existing at all? Certainly not guest lists

[cat @catglum]

The glimpses are like a microdose of that grief. My mind dips its toe in the cold water of the grief and then backs out. Just often enough to remind me that I have much more to feel, and to make me wonder why I have to wait.

[cat @catglum]

Staring at photos of my mom trying to force my brain to feel that she is dead. Sometimes I get glimpses of it that are so intense, I feel my body shut it down. Right before she got sick, I had a dream she got sick and died, and I bawled in the dream in a way i haven’t irl. But

[cat @catglum]

I am kind of annoyed like I literally always knew my parents were going to die earlier for me than for some and it’s just a reality shock that I’m like 🙄 yup I’m there now. Would be nice to be the kinda gal who doesn’t have to sweat it til I’m literally old but that’s never been

[cat @catglum]

I’m actually doing really good. I’m doing rlly rlly good. I’m so sad that my mom died but I’m so mad she sucked. Also your mom is always supposed to die right? Watching someone die is traumatic. Watching your mom get thin and weak and immobile and nonverbal and dead is scary

[cat @catglum]

Anyway I know that’s why intense and im not trying to be sardonic I am also confused about it because I’m for all intents and purposes like doing pretty well

[cat @catglum]

I’m so pro zohran it’s crazy. I’m just rlly rlly convinced that mf is doing shit RIGHT like he’s fuckin just shooting off here and there funding good causes and making shit happen left and right. Small random ideal shit it’s so sick

[cat @catglum]

Sorry I’m late my situationship and I were fighting about whether it’s homophobic that he wouldn’t want to fuck a clone of himself

[cat @catglum]

I have not seen Marty supreme in just here to see I’ve never seen such polarized reviews in my feed before

[cat @catglum]

Feeling kind of pissed off that my mom died

[cat @catglum]

@drofnavmod Is your cat named employee??

[cat @catglum]

Also was it just a thing about tv in this era that your whole thing could be the exact same plot device repeating 5x per season or ?

[cat @catglum]

The soundtrack to every season of suits is so atrociously 2009-11 it disgusts me

[zoë @zoeloveshouses]

one day without warning i’m gonna unfollow all my male mutuals who still follow dasha

[cat @catglum]

Synced again!! Gasp I’m on the Sylvia path. I hope I hit a fork before the end lol

[Sylvia Plath's Food Diary @whatsylviaate]

I’ve been so crushingly busy with this move I’ve hardly had time for a cup of tea. 12/15/62

[cat @catglum]

There’s literally no way the somewhat twitter famous person I’ve been on two dates with hasn’t checked my tweets right

[cat @catglum]

I drunk crashed out last night about my mom dying the same way I used to drunk crash out about her being an emotionally abusive alcoholic. Turns out you really can have it all

[cat @catglum]

I love when my friends are doing something fun that doesn’t involve any of my enemies

[cat @catglum]

What’s sick as fuck though is it has nothing to do with the stuff that has usually been causing me a bad time for the last year haha. Except probably my mom dying a little bit. Will not examine

[cat @catglum]

I’m having a BAD time. Maybe I should be tweeting more