Catherine Elzinga

I’ve had a very long day. I am very small. and I have no money. so you can imagine the stress I am under

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

Most of my disappointment in life relates to the fact that dairy queen closes at 9pm

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

Babe are you okay you’ve barely touched the Paddington 2 tweets I sent you

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

When you need to go on a walk but the snow is taller than you are

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@mom_ithrewup Sugar how you get so fly

[John Mulaney @mulaney]

...And stay out!

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@mom_ithrewup You’re welcome

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@NoraWornhoff I just want to see Paul Hollywood lounging around the villa

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@pierogi_boy I wish I could thumbs down a tweet

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@pierogi_boy you’re welcome

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

the kid I’m babysitting just referred to a slim jim as a “spicy baby hot dog” so that’s what we’re calling them now

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@mom_ithrewup I’ll throw up

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@NoraWornhoff I hear great things about the Curtis parking garage!

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

if whoever spilled an entire family sized box of cheerios down joselin avenue today is reading this, I hope your day got better

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@NoraWornhoff don’t test the stoat

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@IHATEDOOGAL2 no body care me

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

I’d like to feel bad about running through emails for free trials, but I did just sign billybob97 up for hulu and now at this point it’s on them for not catching on

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

my timehop from 7 years ago today makes me want to crawl in a hole and never come back out

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

@hannagates98 Rick is the goat

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

please @instagram I’m begging you make a feature that let’s me mute any stories of a spotify screenshot

[Catherine Elzinga @catherineelzing]

Me, to myself when I watch true crime documentaries at night and then get too scared to turn the lights off

[Ally Mattingly @ally_mattingly]

the indy 500, but instead of using the speedway track it’s around the figure-8 roundabouts in carmel