Timothy Kenny

Construction estimator by day, writer by train commute, husband & father by night. Trying to get my first novel published. #amwriting #amquerying #humor

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

@RealChrisSays Both of them are money.

[Paul Fairie @paulisci]

A Brief History of Nobody Wants to Work Anymore

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[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

These sick bastards have a demented view of what constitutes 'Summer Fun'.

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

My 8-year-old has big plans for today.

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

I posted this on February 26. Soon after, we learned about COVID. On March 16, we began working from home. On the 30th, we were asked to take a 20% pay cut and laid off 1/6th of our staff. So I'll alter my question below: HOW DID SHE KNOW?!?!

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

My wife got this note from my 6-year-old this morning. I am fucking terrified of getting fired right now. What does she know? WHAT DOES SHE KNOW?!?!

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

My wife got this note from my 6-year-old this morning. I am fucking terrified of getting fired right now. What does she know? WHAT DOES SHE KNOW?!?!

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

My cousin got her 3-year-old nephew this dinosaur whose eyes light up and it roars and shoots spittle. Pretty bad ass, right?
Wait, what's that...?
Hmm, I didn't realize T-Rexes also sashayed...

[Timothy Kenny @cerealandrubber]

He gets most of his business by standing on the sidewalk and waiting for people to stare directly at him.