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I’m from New York so I’m cocky

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Paris Hilton is the Julia Child of our generation

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I know everything I need to know about you based on your telephone versus video phone preferences

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Lady Gaga was serving Sharpay Evans bop to the top realness

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Miss Piggy really was the first baddie on the scene… makes sense I was always her for Halloween

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Tim Robinson gets it

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I’m a tacky bitch

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I’m so jealous of Rachel sennot I think I’m gonna throw up

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I would simply gain too much power if I dressed up as Stassi Schroeder for Halloween

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Anyone hating on just this Taylor album is the least genuine hater

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In Italy paparazzi got called on me because similar to Sydney freak show I too am blonde and have boobs; however I convinced myself a dice from my backgammon set killed someone….I thought I was getting Amanda knoxed

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In about 10 years everyone who got married is going to look back at their photos and be like “what the cowboy hat”

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Soooo jealous of people who’s job is being pretty

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I miss the vehicle thot era

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I can’t wait to get sued one day

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Anytime I get my make up professionally done I show a photo of a pop star and every time the artist is like “I mean she’s a pop star so you’re not gunna want that look for xyz chill event”. Yes I obviously do.

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I think I had abs in high school because I was constantly sucking in. Tbh best workout.

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I really want my unborn child to be a pop star or doctor

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Free city fall

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I could give a shit about a grown woman taking the next step in her relationship. What I do care about though is how Zoe kravitz pulls so hard and that should come as a shock to absolutely no one.

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Stone fruit is the hottest genre of fruit

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When I’m a grandma I want to be referred to as “baddie”