If you struggle in areas like asking for help or setting boundaries, some people will attempt to exploit you because you give more than you take. Pray for growth, and for a partner/friends who help you overcome your weaknesses - instead of using your weaknesses for personal gain.
Let me post this again…
On the issue of DNA and paternity test, it is one of those things you should never let your wife know you did.
It’d seem y’all do away with emotions when you tweet things. If you ever have a reason to question the paternity of your children, please visit the hospital, get a swab, get your child/children specimen and run it yourself. Alone.
Without bias, let’s not act like the opinion of both sides; men and women are totally dubious.
Before now, it’d stand firmly on “wtf” side of it but we’ve all seen paternity fraud play out again and again and so it’d be unfair of me to say I do not understand why anyone would feel this way. A man is right to be weary.
However, let us also not forget the other side of it. There’s no clearer way to say to your wife “I do not trust you”, than it.
So, if my husband ever discusses with me a DNA test, it will be a very big turning point for us because if you do not trust me, what then are we doing?
In everything you do, always apply sense.
There’s simply no woman that’d take it with a smile both the faithful and unfaithful.
Scenes where she’d been faithful and you outrightly confronted her with your suspicions and it turn out they’re unfounded, what next? Where do you go from there? “Oh! True-true they’re my children oo! Ngwanu let’s carry on” ???
If that woman has given you absolutely no reason to doubt her, do not ruin your marriage. If you must, keep it away from her.
Again, wisdom is profitable to direct.
If I go to my friend’s house and she requests to search my bag because her money is missing, regardless if I took it or not, I’m never going back there.
Was she right to look for her stuff? Yes.
Was she right to suspect me? Arguable.
Was she right to search me? No.
Not if I do not have a history of stealing.
Not if I’d never given her a reason to suspect me.
Dicy situations require tact most especially when you’re dealing with the people you love. You must find ways to go about it guarding yourself but at the same time not hurt (even worse unnecessarily and unwarrantedly) the other person. You could be right but what if you are not?
A lot of you don’t have emotional intelligence and it’s terrible.
Are you right in trying to protect yourself? Yes. But a smart person knows how to go about it without hurting someone else in the process, most especially someone you call wife.
That aside. Now ask yourself, if you’re getting married and you have it at the back of your mind that you must run a DNA test, why’re you marrying that person? Are you consummating love or are you getting into a partnership?
Things that’re supposed to come up only as a “arising” or a consequence of an action or series of it becomes your bedrock?
“Baby I’m pregnant”,
“Oh my God! Yes!!! (Internal monologue) *let’s wait till I do DNA shaa before I can complete my joy*”, is that it?
It’d seem you people get married because it’s a rite of ritual and not because you really yearn it and the person you’re in it with.
You guard this, you prepare for that, you anticipate this, you suspect that… Is it war???
Things might inevitably go wrong, unfortunately but starting something new and actively looking and preparing for when it’ll go wrong is insane to me. Maybe not start it at all???
Anyway…
You see that Nathaniel Bassey's "See what The Lord Has Done"? I'm going to sing it and be rolling on the ground one day when my beans don done . No matter how long the song ages, I must still sing it And soon , Very soon it'll happen….🙏
Dear Men!!!
After almost 2 years of working as a nurse in a male ward, I can tell you 2 things I've observed.
1, As a married man, the only person who's going to be by your bedside when you are sick is your wife. I repeat, your wife.
So let's move on.
In the light of the trending divorce story, I've come across some opinions saying...
"your wife is not part of your family"
Despite the stories we get to read or hear, on daily about some women/wives, I beg to disagree.
Your wife is not part of your family
The menstrual circle,pregnancy,labor and delivery is different for women. One woman isn’t better than the other because she can deal with menstrual pains without a pain killer or will prefer natural birth to a CS etc. Please don’t be stupid and ignorant about stuff like these.