chelsea

why don’t we... tweet something these hoes will like

[chelsea @chelsboat]

If you wanted to see me at the NC Comedy Festival but didn’t (what??), boy do I have a treat for you! https://t.co/Hf9ynmlqwL via @YouTube

[maha @mahaaaay]

men love saying let’s fucking go. yes. let’s fucking go to therapy big dog

[chelsea @chelsboat]

@El_Cliente Are you a nola boy!!!

[chelsea @chelsboat]

hi nola !!!

[chelsea @chelsboat]

This is the best shirt

[chelsea @chelsboat]

brb, going to the woods to practice my thunderstruck choreo in peace and privacy

[chelsea @chelsboat]

It’s just not true and I know that by eating a lot of pickles and being *very* crazy

[S.LIZ @slizagna]

finally. a cure.

[chelsea @chelsboat]

**relatable**

[Ministress of Enjoyments @LaCienegaBlvdss]

Zoologists believe foxes are currently trying to become domesticated.

They’re taking on cat/dog like behaviors hoping humans will take on the burden of feeding and caring for them because they’re tired of the wild.

[chelsea @chelsboat]

Anytime someone disrespects Beyoncé I get the urge to do crime™️

[kim @KimmyMonte]

do i want a pizza crust made from cauliflower? oh yeh sounds great and while you’re at it why don’t you milk a piece of broccoli and serve it to me in a wine glass, you stupid piece of shit.

[Badly Drawn Bears @BadlyDrawnBears]

Life is for living. And chicken nuggets. Xox

[chelsea @chelsboat]

The count is up to seven now and honestly even I can’t believe it

[chelsea @chelsboat]

Whenever I can tell that someone thinks that I’m a real sweetie pie I like to drop that I’ve tased four people and one of em is me.

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

i don’t think there should be punishment for crimes that are objectively funny

[sugar gay @anewmisery]

do not kill yourself chili's will save you

[chelsea @chelsboat]

I know I haven’t been on here in awhile but just checking in to see if anyone thinks I would be a good ranch hand (considering a life pívot)

[chelsea @chelsboat]

@JoeBiden just announce that student loans got accidentally deleted. it would be cute and funny and i *know* that you know a guy who can do it

[KILLER MEG (Interdimensional entity..) @horse_feedbag]

I bring a “if i don’t win I’ll kill myself” vibe to the pub trivia night that the casual beer drinkers can’t quite fuck with