Chelana

it's not now or never. just don't make me wait forever

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

The cashier at Albertsons said I looked like a supermodel walking down the aisles and now I’m still here bc my heads so big I couldn’t fit through the exit

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

Donald Trump had over 3,700 stock transactions since the war in Iran started, and he profited over 220 million dollars. Don't tell me how he "donates his presidential salary" ever again you stupid fucking MAGAs

[boob dylan @BYUsupersoaker]

its gonna be a Hunter Biden summer (staying away from crack and reminding others that nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes)

[Fav ⛧ @Favwontmiss]

Instead of saying 3,2,1 go and try and get up, I say come on Barbie let’s go party and it always works.

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

Someone stole my brand new (month old) bike right out of the garage. I know as soon as I can accept I’ll never get it back and just buy a new one I will feel better but for now I’m just sad at the joy that’s been robbed from me

[Fav ⛧ @Favwontmiss]

The best straight relationships are:

- Man who constantly gets gay allegations
- Woman who 300 years ago would have been accused of being a witch

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

I just ate like a half pound of raw fish after ordering a raw fish app and it was a mental struggle but I got through. I’m sure I’ll forgot this and do this again

[Nandi 🤍💜🤍 @pallnandi]

The Epstein file is so bad the government gave you a war, a new virus, and aliens to keep you distracted from it.

[retrocvnt @retrocvnty]

This is the most iconic character entrance and no one can change my mind

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

My eyes are burning because I ate pepperoni as a late night snack and took my contacts out and if that doesn’t depress you you should try it

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

Someone put me in a slow feeder I just ate an XL popcorn at the movies

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

@pinkskies_zh I hope this is the band. Ily but what do I have to do to get a signed vinyl?? Incredible show in MPLS tonight

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

@BENEEMUSIC please please please play same effect on Monday I’m begging I’m sick of being alone

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

What’s the anti shampoo effect called

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

Can’t believe I spent 20 bucks to rent the housemaid. Worst movie I’ve seen in a long time

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

How is no one talking about the clapping in Alysa Lou’s free program or whatever like if that doesn’t show the joy that she brings to the sport and to life then idk what will

[cal? @cal_gif]

no i dont ride my horse into battle what the hell is wrong with you she could get hurt. she drops me off and then she stands on the sidelines with a gun

[Chelana @chelsbourd]

How about “onside kicks” which is the @nfl version of @nhl heated rivalry

[Melech. @MelechThomas]

yeah this is nasty

[Shannon Watts @shannonrwatts]

Already invoking the Nuremberg defense. A reminder to all that acting under superior orders does not relieve you of responsibility if a moral choice was possible.

[𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚌𝚌 𝙲𝚑𝚞𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚜 🍄 @anactualwalnut]

When I was a teenager I got in a fight and had to go through a juvenile detention board panel to avoid a charge on my permanent record, despite the fact I didn’t even start the fight or throw the first punch, because my “reaction was not equal”, meaning (from what I understood and remember from the time) I reacted too violently to the altercation. I (allegedly) took it to a level it didn’t need to go to because all the other girl did was pull my hair and swing on me. I should’ve “de escalated” “walked away” etc. according to the police who watched the footage (there was a camera in the hallway), but instead I… did not do that. lol.

Anyway, I say this because the police told me, as a teenage girl, with zero training on any de escalating tactics, who wasn’t even the initial aggressor, I should’ve either just not reacted, walked away, or mentally calculated what an equal reaction should’ve been in the midst of all this.

But asking that of full grown adult trained federal agents is asking too much.

Please spare me