Chelsea the Terrible

the definition of avoidant attachment

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Hell breaks loose when you tell your Filipino mom that you’re dating at the age of 30

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Someone today called me a “girl’s girl” and honestly I’m so flattered

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

As a PT guys I date want me to massage them and I respond by going on a rant about evidence based practice so this is why I’ll just be single forever lmao

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

As someone who’s been single my entire life I feel like I’m losing a part of myself by talking to men who are actually interested in me and I kinda hate it

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Actually I killed it and humbled him

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

I don’t even know why I suggested rock climbing as a date when I clearly suck at it.

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

When you go back to your old retail job and your old coworkers remember you 😭

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Student: “you talk about the most terrible things so nonchantly”

Me: “that’s what happens when you work in a hospital”

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Technically I don’t turn 30 until 10pm so I’m still in my 20s 😏💀

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Another day another doctor who just walks in as I start my session (with a video interpreter) and then completely takes over for 30 mins while I stand and watch awkwardly in the corner as my productivity withers away

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

The weird thing about going on a good date is that your life might have to change afterwards.

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Do I just instill fear in men? I think so.

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

I might be single af but you know, I was called beautiful today by a celebrity (who is also a s*x offender) and it really cheered me up (not)

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

I mean I like nerdy guys but at the same time I feel like I can fold them up like a pretzel and break all their bones.

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

I downloaded Hinge because I’m having an existential crisis and now I have a date. I’m attempting to invest in relationships, you see.

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Me pissed off that the store’s crowded on a Tuesday wondering why people aren’t working at this time even though I’m also not working at this time

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Having kids sounds really hard and I don’t wanna struggle being a single mom atm but I know mine would most likely be really cute so

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

When your best friend’s mom offers you sage to cleanse your apartment lol

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Because I don’t want to end up like my neighbor I should probably start investing in relationships

[Chelsea the Terrible @chelseasaverage]

Me: “how’s the patient’s cognition?”

ED physician who ordered a stat PT eval: “it’s fine, you can have a conversation”

Meanwhile they’re actually the most confused and agitated person