Certified Turtle

cigarette respecter. obesity disrespecter. 🫃

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@AnthonyRomano8 @Pride @MLB This is just a regular Mets game

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

Fuck Ahsoka #dumbbitch

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@FabrizioRomano I hate this club man. what are we doing here

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@ElieNYC @thenation Get fucked

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@FirstDoctor Shut up bitch

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@aubrey_huff @SFGiants Patriot

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@MortyBallstein @nycDSA @david4queens Surely you can do better than that

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@AlfHoratio @n0nc3beater @PainBruv Gareth bale is the greatest British player of all time

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@StephenM @michaeljknowles Damn bro if only there was something u could do

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

What even is New York if you’re not a complete fucking loser

[Globalize The Enchilada #Rubio2028 ☩ 🇺🇸🇯🇵 @GlobalEnchilada]

You don’t hate this strain of millennials enough. https://t.co/3lZTeyQfTZ

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@alicianieves__ Worst take I’ll read all day and I’ve just only opened up this app wtf are you talking about lmao

[Josiah Lippincott @jlippincott]

I'm assembling a team.

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@SanaSaeed Rape?

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

A man earnestly campaigning for a Democrat is gayer than getting AIDS from a flight attendant

[Swish 🍒 Tennis @Zwxsh]

Reporter: "No F-bombs please."

Corentin Moutet: "Fuck fuck fuck."

Reporter: "I'm gonna ask you one more question so please keep it clean, okay?"

Corentin Moutet: "Fuck fuck fuck."

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@SpecialEdmund got that dog in u

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

@metrowest1000 @HawleyMO Do you have the same opinion if the players were Muslims

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

The literal goat is his boss and he still can’t take notes

Never fix your lips smh

[Politics & Poll Tracker 📡 @PollTracker2024]

NBC News: Vance calls his ‘childless cat ladies’ comment “one of the dumbest things I ever said”

Vice President JD Vance, who previously stood by the insult of Kamala Harris and other Democrats, writes in his new book that the remarks were “a clear moment where I failed.”

https://t.co/GlD8FG0oIf

[Certified Turtle @chief_ofass]

My dad was really out here getting ejected from my little league games man. Mad fuckin respect #rideordie