Chimpotle

Encased meat enthusiast.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@VINNY2323 @scratchbeer Assumed. Anything there that is a recommended option?

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@Runningboard7 Ugh, see last tweet 😩

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Been sitting outside running a fire for hours. Sitting alone now. Pale Green Things on the speakers. Big Dipper over my house. Ignoring the soulless workweek I will resume tomorrow.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

I'm, "I didn't even realize Sugar Ray's 'Fly' without Supercat came on the speakers" drunk right now.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@amveats Maybe one of the seven dems born before 1940 thought this would be a great idea to show the kids how they got things done back in their day. Horrifyingly, today is also still their day.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@DCMiller1212 @BigBobInKC Looks much better mounted on my headboard

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Public solicitation: looking for a logo to place on stamp to stop writing down my trivia team's name. Willing to compensate for low complexity/effort. Team name? Tongue Punch

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Fav moment of return to office has been watching someone swerve to avoid slamming into my backend while stopped on the interstate. Definitely don't get that kind of thrill while safely sitting at home not wasting money and hours commuting.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

To be clear, I actively chose the middle stall when I could have left a gap.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

First official day back in the office since shutdown. Forgot what it was like to poop next to another person.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Missed today's Wordle, but I leveraged a first word of PENIS straight to NYMPH yesterday...so still riding high.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@Runningboard7 I am always taken aback when I see people order whole cakes in the drive thru.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Apparently all someone wanted for Christmas was to use my email to sign up for OnlyFans 🤷🏻

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

"It's not the size of the long furby, it's how you use it."

Merry Christmas 2021

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Everybody loves the Ignition (Remix) until R.Kelly shows up as a top artist in your 2021 #SpotifyWrapped

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@Runningboard7 I feel like after 8 years, I finally became a Bears fan tonight. Such awful.

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

I was about to get upset about my child leaving @Pringles by my bed. Until I rationalized my child hiding Pringles by my bed...

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

Began the day excited about all the work I would get around to. Six hours of meetings later... #TGIEffed

[Chimpotle @chimpotle]

@snackmantis @drmstrng I bought a case of it online last week having never tried one. Should fit in well all the other alcohol I don't drink.