Chloe

Sad that my twitter doesn't convey my unparalleled humour

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@McDonaldsUK 6zxxzS"*££

[Nicola Sturgeon @NicolaSturgeon]

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@kaylawallace_ That's fab!

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

Being an adult is your parents stealing your booze rather than you stealing theirs

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@ellis_apples so in awe of your bravery here ❤️

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@megabusuk I need to use your buses to go from Glasgow to Aberdeen for a funeral in the next few days. Is that okay? I won't be stopped from taking the bus or anything?

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@ScotRail Are the times on the live departures on the app correct? I was relying on getting the last train after I finished work from shettleston into town and it ran 5 minutes early and I missed it and had to take the bus. I think the train was following its normal time?

[Get em banned. @wyettsworld]

Why are y’all so obsessed with the 1% of false rape allegations?

[Girl Up Strathclyde @GirlUpStrath]

Only Two weeks to go!

Only Two weeks to go until our Words for Women event to celebrate International Women's Day!

Make sure you buy your tickets in the link below so that you can come along and listen to our great speakers who can be found on our page!
https://t.co/PSLlCqwHrD

[Lewis Capaldi @LewisCapaldi]

BREAKING NEWS: Rock hard boners on the rise in the Times Square today #ErectoPerfecto

[Nicky @nickturani]

Happy 5 years baby ❤️ Thank you for the late night talks, good morning texts, and just being real with me 100% of the time. Can’t wait to meet you in person.

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

on our walk today. we passed the cutest pup in the world. i was too scared to say anything. and just kept walking. but i’m telling everyone. i have a valentine

[GL @gldivittorio]

Dump your boyfriend not because I’m bored but because Valentine’s Day is coming up and it’s hard to explain but we can’t let capitalism win

[BBC Politics @BBCPolitics]

“Hugely disappointing”

Communities Secretary James Brokenshire on Conservative MP Christopher Chope blocking a bill on female genital mutilation this week

#Marr https://t.co/jNPF4Chcpo

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@BeccaMarriner He’s the cunt

[Lewis Capaldi @LewisCapaldi]

looking at your phone while you’re sitting on the toilet is a hundred times better than looking at your phone anywhere else

[mads @maddyscribbles]

can someone just fancy me already because I have too many perfect date plans that are going to waste honestly

[Thomas Sanders @ThomasSanders]

Today I learned not /everyone/ sneezes when they come into contact with bright light???

[Chloe @chlotothejo]

@BeccaMarriner How could you even manage to say that? Pn does not feel natural

[Ireland / @ireland]

Ok.

Im going to explain in detail why Churchill is a villain. For the 31% of you who voted as a positive just read this and tell me afterwards. https://t.co/EMeIzDK3JN