charmayne 💙

NHS Speech and Language Therapist and MOJ Registered Intermediary. Clinical Leadership Fellow.

[Iamemperor @Iamemperor00]

Principal: “Why is there a tiger in the teachers’ lounge?”

Janitor: “That’s Mr. Whiskers.”

Principal: “That is not a Mr. Whiskers.”

Janitor: “That’s what we called him.”

Principal: “It’s a tiger.”

Janitor: “A very large cat.”

Principal: “A very large lawsuit.”

Teacher: “In fairness, he’s been well-behaved.”

Principal: “How long has there been a tiger in my school?”

Teacher: “Three weeks.”

Principal: “THREE WEEKS?”

Teacher: “We thought you knew.”

Principal: “How would I know?”

Teacher: “He’s attended every staff meeting.”

Principal: “I’m sorry?”

Teacher: “Perfect attendance.”

Principal: “The tiger attends staff meetings.”

Teacher: “More consistently than Mr. Harris.”

Principal: “Where did he come from?”

Janitor: “The lost and found.”

Principal: “No.”

Janitor: “Yes.”

Principal: “Nobody loses a tiger.”

Janitor: “That’s what I said.”

Principal: “Then why didn’t you call animal control?”

Janitor: “We tried.”

Principal: “And?”

Janitor: “They put us on hold.”

Principal: “For three weeks?”

Janitor: “Very long hold.”

Teacher: “The music was excellent.”

Principal: “This is insanity.”

Student: “Can I pet him?”

Principal: “Absolutely not.”

Student: “Too late.”

Principal: “TOO LATE?”

Student: “He’s soft.”

Principal: “Where are his owners?”

Janitor: “That’s the interesting part.”

Principal: “There’s an interesting part?”

Janitor: “He has a collar.”

Principal: “Good.”

Janitor: “With a phone number.”

Principal: “Even better.”

Janitor: “We called it.”

Principal: “And?”

Janitor: “The tiger answered.”

Principal: “…”

Teacher: “Speakerphone.”

Principal: “No.”

Janitor: “He growled twice.”

Principal: “That’s not answering.”

Teacher: “According to the translation app, it meant, ‘Running late.’”

Principal: “You used a translation app on a tiger.”

Teacher: “Technology is amazing.”

Principal: “I need a vacation.”

School Secretary: “Uh, principal?”

Principal: “What now?”

School Secretary: “A limousine just pulled up.”

Principal: “Please tell me it’s animal control.”

School Secretary: “No.”

Principal: “Then who is it?”

Billionaire: “I’m here for Mr. Whiskers.”

Principal: “That’s your tiger?”

Billionaire: “Former tiger.”

Principal: “Former?”

Billionaire: “He resigned.”

Principal: “Tigers can’t resign.”

Billionaire: “Tell him that.”

Teacher: “He’s actually been a fantastic substitute teacher.”

Principal: “I’m surrounded by lunatics.”

Mr. Whiskers: “Grrr.”

Teacher: “He says the math scores improved.”

Principal: “I quit.”

[Aaron Bastani @AaronBastani]

Superb political ad. One of the best you’ll see.

This is better, and resonates more, than anything coming from Labour or the Tories.

[BrooklynDad_Defiant!☮️ @mmpadellan]

BREAKING:
- Hillary Clinton never met Epstein, never on his jet or island
- Where are the missing FBI files?
- Demands that trump testify to their committee, under oath, NOW

trump is a guilty chickenshit.
He'll NEVER do it.

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@Daggers87 @CourtsIdle @Joanna__Hardy @BarristerSecret Just waiting now for the sound in a video link room to work. This means that the witnesses aged 6 and 7 have been kept waiting for nearly 3 hours and we still don’t know if it will be fixed today.

[Brexitshambles @brexit_sham]

Reform UK financial backer and party Treasurer Nick Candy kept contact with Jeffrey Epstein after sex conviction. Via ⁦@Searchlight_mag⁩ https://t.co/F1xbgqth3F

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@Girl41546839 @InspectorMorose A lot of unanswered questions. Why did the OIC change her conviction about who dunnit?

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@mark_s1505 @StickToCricket The batsman’s Holding. The bowler’s Willey.

[Adam Richman @AdamRichman]

👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼

[Liberal Democrats @LibDems]

Parents of children with SEND are at breaking point, there are not enough spaces in specialist schools, and the EHCP process is long, harrowing and degrading.

Will this government take our call to introduce a national body for SEND and fix this problem for good?

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@nedwards_1 Does the NHS have to reinvest in the community. estate it has gradually sold off over the last 30 years? Or invest in the private companies , AKA GP practices, in order to have the space and capacity to deliver against this plan.

[James Lucas @JamesLucasIT]

The ancient Romans were known for building tombs for their dogs, inscribing epitaphs to keep their memory alive — a thread 🧵

1. “I am in tears, while carrying you to your last resting place as much as I rejoiced when bringing you home with my own hands 15 years ago.”

[Institute for Fiscal Studies @TheIFS]

NEW: Sure Start generated widespread, long-lasting benefits for children in education, health, absences, and SEND.

Every £1 of up-front spending on Sure Start could generate around £2 in total benefits over the long run.

THREAD on our new @NuffieldFound-funded report:

[1/11]

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@devourtours I have booked and paid for a tour but have had to confirmation email and am unable to download e-ticket. I am able to find my booking reference so can see that I have been registered on your website. Please advise

[Mario @PawlowskiMario]

And that’s why this country will never be taken seriously from now on for generations.

Official White House account just reposted this.😳

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@BootsUK When you go out of business I will be little surprised or sympathetic. My last 3 visits have been very disappointing. Out of stock items, simple items ‘we don’t stock any more’ and today ‘sorry the pharmacist is at lunch’. This is in a large edge of town retail park.

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@bbcweather From Constantine beach Cornwall at about 11am

[Protect Kamala Harris ✊ @DisavowTrump20]

RETWEET if you stand with President Zelensky!

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@peterrhague @DaddyCoffee73 We all pull our weight to teach your children, mend your road or minister to your sick. But we all pay taxes.

[Lesley Abravanel 🪩 @lesleyabravanel]

Trump is 100% unfit, unwell, and being manipulated by an apartheid Nazi South African.

[charmayne 💙 @chlouhe]

@Morrisons
You do not have enough tills open at Binley store (Coventry) . We are 6 deep at the 2 of 12 that are open. Won’t come here again.