Chris Kortmann

Husband of @MeghanHarlow. Vegas enthusiast. Fan of NYG, NYM, NYR, and TOT. Michelin star collector. Burrito connoisseur.

[Chris Kortmann @chriskort]

In 2017, I paid Cards Against Humanity to protect a pristine plot of border land from Trump’s racist wall. But then an even richer, more racist billionaire—Elon Musk—stole my land and dumped his shit all over it. @ElonMusk owes me $100. #ElonOwesMe100Bucks https://t.co/I489yGnWy6

[Chris Kortmann @chriskort]

. @OptumRx
is the WORST. Decided that the medication that I was on for 3 years that worked flawlessly shouldn't be covered anymore, even though the other meds in the same category are covered! Greedy fat cats that value profits over people! All about the 💵💵💵

[Richard Staff @RichardStaff]

Liz Truss had such an awful 44 days that you’d think the Mets traded for her at the deadline

[Godot Jove @AC3ATTORN3Y]

"Gen Z is obsessed with subtitles" man i cant fucking hear what the characters are saying bc nobody knows how to mix their fuckin audio

[Matt Davies @MatttDavies]

I scream, you scream https://t.co/AbvotV7YOS

[Thomas Zimmer @tzimmer_history]

We are in the midst of a multi-pronged, multi-level reactionary counter-mobilization that has a judicial arm, a political arm, an intellectual arm, and a paramilitary arm, all flanked by a highly effective media/propaganda machine. And it is rapidly accelerating.

A thread:

[Chris Kortmann @chriskort]

Weekend Update: Goober the Clown on Abortion - SNL https://t.co/aMlQkUVlfF via @YouTube

[Chris Kortmann @chriskort]

@degenEli Congrats!

[Chris Kortmann @chriskort]

@theIDPharmD I'm worried that this is the first five letter word you thought of.

[Matt Davies @MatttDavies]

https://t.co/AbvotV7qZk

[Scorigami @NFL_Scorigami]

HOU 5 - 31 ARI
Final

That's Scorigami!! It's the 1068th unique final score in NFL history.

[Chris Kortmann @chriskort]

@Giants Yes please!

[Misnomer @Misnomer]

It’s gotta be the gabagool.

[Rio Hotel & Casino Las Vegas @RioVegas]

Eat. Sleep. Nachos. Repeat. 😋

[Sarah Sinclair @sarbearsmiley]

GIVEAWAY! 🐝 There has been so much love for my #NYTSpellingBee hat pattern, but not everyone knows how to knit—so I decided to create this special giveaway hat just for the Twitter #HiveMind! Just retweet this post to enter; I'll pick a random winner on Weds 8/25! 🙂 @thegridkid

[Matt Davies @MatttDavies]

https://t.co/AbvotV7qZk