*37 degrees outside*
Fuel pump:
“would you like a car wash today?”
“is this a debit card?”
“would you like to use fuel points?”
“need a receipt?”
“is it time for a haircut?”
“how do you feel about the affordable care act?”
Like imagine being THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, and George Clooney states that he thinks you should pull out of the presidential race, and you (POTUS), say “Golly gee, I hadn’t thought about that. Since George Clooney thinks that I should withdraw, well okay!”
Girl at Palm Beach Tan “So what color is the dark?”
Palm Beach employee: “Not super dark- it is my color I have on now!!” *strokes arm to show color*
Girl at Palm Beach Tan “Okay, thanks I’ll do the medium!”
2023 announcement: I’m only supporting celebs/professional sports players/musicians that do their thing without giving political lectures. Whichever way you go, I don’t want to know. No one asked and no one cares 🫠 #yanotapolitician
My son’s 3songs that brings him happiness are (in no particular order):
1. Wheels on the Bus- Cocomelon
2. Baby Shark - Pinkfong
3. Swag Surfin’ - Fast Life Yungstaz
Just had to announce this deal‼️ for only $60.56/month for 18 months, you can OWN this top from Amazon to have the resemblance of a real life blue-gilled fish! Don’t miss out on this opportunity
“What are we eating for dinner tonight? - me
“You can eat my dead body.” - Tyler, after witnessing his other soulmate Tom Brady lose against the Rams 🙄 #dramatic
I love that celebs *truly* think that everyone *truly* cares about their opinions on any and every subject matter AND think it will sway listeners’ opinions on said subject matter #lol