chris ade

Personal trainer slash mixed martial artist slash shitty comedian slash

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

A dog doesn't judge you if your an alcoholic ...... until you try to eat out of his food dish

[Ken Hicks @comicKenHicks]

My sex life is like a mint Wayne Gretzky rookie card. I don't have one, and if wanted one it would cost a lot money.

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

Using this Android app : https://t.co/kPL1FNAP

I found this awesome picture by trebbyeah : http://t.co/KKKrRe6m

Check it out !!

[Duchess Gummybuns @Kathleen_McGee]

I only know the day of the week based on what comedy show I'm doing that night.

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

I went into the doctors because I had a sore throat when he asked me if it hurt to swallow I said " only emotionally"

[Ken Hicks @comicKenHicks]

If my wife keeps banging on this door & telling me to get out of the tub, i'm going to drink my epson salt bath water. Then she'll be sorry

[Ken Hicks @comicKenHicks]

Some cuddle after sex, some eat, others smoke. I like to remember to say those 3 important little words; Delete Browser History

[Ken Hicks @comicKenHicks]

How does a parent have a logical debate about common sense with an adolesent who's more worked up about losing her phone, than her virginity

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

three hours and fifty minutes finally went down do I still call my doctor anyway

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

wearing crocs is like getting blown by a guy ( hear me out on this ). It feels comfortable until you look down and realise shit I'm gay

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

@comicKenHicks

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

@Steveisfunny

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

I'm back on twitter mo for s

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

pjhjt gamG.

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

Thanks.

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

a heardsome one once say that god hates homosexuals ........if he didnt like them then why would he make them soooo goddam sexy

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

if you play strip poker with a stripper does she get paid time and a half

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

do you think def people are better at charades

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

i found the cure for ocd...... alhzmers

[chris ade @chriswilliamade]

i will be headling. at the corner of a 137 ave not at a comedy club just the corner of 137 ave tellin knock knock jokes for food