maybe it'll help someone out there but the best lesson I learned in my 20s was to surround myself with great friends who weren't afraid of confrontation & being upfront with how they felt and open-minded in those hard conversations. dealing with indirect people who refuse to address problems directly and yet still talk about the issue behind your back to others will be a big source of anxiety & the pit in your stomach regarding friendships. there's a lot of wonderful people out there, but you absolutely do have to look ✨
When you are with someone who cannot regulate their emotions, who takes everything personally, who twists your words and holds grudges, even the smallest disagreement becomes a war. But when you are with the right person, conflict is not a battlefield. It is a conversation.
If you are at fault, apologize. A simple, sincere "I was wrong. I am sorry" can defuse tension faster than any explanation. The right partner will not punish you for your mistakes. They will respect your accountability. A partner who is emotionally intelligent and secure will understand and recognize your accountability. They will not weaponize your apology. They will not use it against you later. They will see it as a sign of maturity and respect you more for it.