ciao 💎

Web Developer IRL | Professional Captcha Solver | ciao#6969 |

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

Hello world, I am ciaohoshi.moca. Thank you @mocaversenft for the sponsored Moca ID mint. Didn't pay any fees, any gas. I'm ready to earn Realm Points! Comment below for Invite Code!

[San FranTokyo @san_frantokyo]

A Vision is a solitary Spark✨

Its journey starts when you follow its パワー and shape its path.

Do you see it?

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

@ryuunator @AswangTribe WAAAA kainggit ang ganda 🥲

[ryu @ryuunator]

Sacrificed 5 manananggals and hatched a Cosmic. The stars have aligned for mes lyk😭✌🏻 @AswangTribe

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

DATU

[Aswang Tribe @AswangTribe]

Datu @ciaoHoshi 🍷

[Aswang Tribe @AswangTribe]

Datu @ciaoHoshi 🍷

[Aswang @AswangNFT]

Congratulations to all of the winners our first pair of Sketch Raffles! ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

The new owners of SKETCH #01 (Vol 1) are:

@sweetbread_eth
@woDtanman
@magicianirl
@ciaoHoshi
@0xSibyl

And MASSIVE ups to our Lakan @Trevor4ever210 for generously donating the extra sketch that he won to the $DUGO raffle so more people can collect the artwork! ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Read the thread below to learn more about my new collection "Aswang's Sketchbook":

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

@GentleDelro @memecoin libre lang. sarap

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

Not gonna be active on Twitter tonight. I’m getting the @memecoin waitlist (a real one) in half an hour (wouldn’t expect a lot of you to understand anyway) so please don’t DM me asking me where to get $MEME
#fd084690 #MEMEWL

[Daily Loud @DailyLoud]

Chris Brown joins a fans TikTok

[DLRB @dlrbmagic]

Community Night with the tribe
@AswangTribe
#IAmAswang

[Aswang @AswangNFT]

🧵 The last three 1/1 artworks in the Aswang Collection will be revealed starting next week ❤️‍🔥

Reply to this post with the theme for the FINAL PANTHEON in the collection to win Manananggals, $DUGO, and Clan Points.

[Aswang @AswangNFT]

9 Angels have been summoned. The Third Pantheon is now complete ❤️‍🔥

[Aswang @AswangNFT]

The Alpha and the Omega have converged!

The winner of Aswang Tribe's SIXTH MEME TOURNAMENT and the new owner of ANGEL #09 - MICHAEL is @DeliciousMangoz! ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Extremely happy to see both the First and the Final Angel in the custody of a good friend and one of the strongest supporters of my art!

Congrats again brother! Super well deserved! That Attack on Tambaluslos video meme was INSANE!! ❤️‍🔥

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

@DeliciousMangoz @AswangTribe @LizDuwendeClan @AswangNFT @GentleDelro watch it 🤣🤣

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

@DeliciousMangoz @AswangTribe @LizDuwendeClan @AswangNFT Wtf 😂😂😂

[DeliciousMangoez 🥭 @DeliciousMangoz]

The day that changed the Aswang server forever🤣
@AswangTribe @LizDuwendeClan @AswangNFT
#DEUSVULT

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

I’m a sucker for @A24

[ciao 💎 @ciaoHoshi]

BEEF on Netflix is shit crazy. A24 always killin it. 💯